Never Thought It'd Be Us
by hana-to-mame
Summary: Audrey and Walter's fighting has been getting worse and worse.  When they finally decide to get a divorce, Drake feels like his life is over.  And what makes it worse is Josh seems to be alright with it.  Eventual slash.
1. The Empty House

**Never Thought It'd Be Us (A Drake & Josh Fanfic)**

**Rated: T**

**Pairing: Drake/Josh**

**Summary: Audrey and Walter's fighting has been getting worse and worse. When they finally decide to get a divorce, Drake feels like his life is over. And what makes it worse is Josh seems to be alright with it. Eventual slash.**

**Chapter 1 - The Empty House (Posted 12 February 2011)**

"I can't believe you, Walter!" Audrey screamed, red-faced and shaking with anger. "It's two in the morning! Where have you been?"

"Out having some _fun_, something we never do anymore!" Walter boomed.

The fight continued, increasing in volume with every passing minute. And Drake and Josh were in bed, awakened by the heated argument. Both knew the other was awake, but they pretended to be asleep, and they pretended the other was asleep. They pretended the argument downstairs wasn't happening, that it would never happen, and everything would be ok in the morning.

That's what they did every night. But the arguments were getting louder and stupider. Until one morning, neither Audrey nor Walter was home.

"Where do you think... they went?" Drake said. He couldn't bring himself to say mom and dad. But he didn't want to start thinking of Walter as anyone other than his dad. It felt so weird, like Drake was no longer allowed to claim him as his father. He was Josh's dad, as they were reminded of every night somewhere in the midst of an argument. But that wasn't the worst of it. The worst was feeling like he had no claim on Josh anymore. If Walter wasn't his dad, then Josh wasn't his brother. And if Josh wasn't his brother, then he had nothing.

Before Josh was in his life, Drake was lonely. He didn't know it then; it had taken his new brother to show him how lonely he was, and to take that loneliness away. Josh gave him the friendship he never knew he needed. He was his _best_ friend.

And now Drake was wishing he'd shown Josh more appreciation. They were drifting apart, and he knew it was because of the trouble between their parents, but he couldn't help but feeling it was his fault too. He may not have been a terrible brother, but he didn't think he was a very good one either.

So he didn't try to push Josh into talking to him. He was grateful for a nod in response to a question. A one-word answer would make his day. And an entire sentence would make him feel high as a kite. What he wanted more than anything was a whole conversation, but he didn't plan on holding his breath waiting for it.

So when Josh said, "I don't know," in answer to Drake's question, Drake beamed. But he didn't say anymore. He knew those would be the only words he got from Josh that day, so he happily accepted the ration and went back to their room to grab his school bag.

Drake almost laughed at himself as he lifted the heavy backpack onto his shoulders. If anyone had told him a year ago that today not only would he _use_ his school materials, but he would _learn_ from them as well, he would have laughed at them for hours.

But that's what was happening. To take his mind off the fact that his family was falling apart, he devoted all his brain power to school. And he discovered that he actually understood most of what he was being taught. Considering all the years he never paid attention, he caught up pretty fast and was proud that he was getting the hang of everything. He even dared to think that someday he could be as smart as Josh if he kept applying himself and working extra hard. Not that he actually _cared_ about school or anything, he just needed something to distract him, and he found that the better he did in school, the easier it was to keep the bad thoughts away.

Drake hauled his school bag down the steps and out the front door. They used to drive to school together, but Drake wasn't comfortable with that arrangement anymore. He felt bad expecting Josh to drive him. And he felt awkward waiting for him. And the silent ride all the way to school was like torture to him. So he left extra early every morning and walked to school. It didn't bother him. In fact, it made him feel proud of himself for being able to do something on his own, not having to rely on Josh for everything. And as much as he didn't want to think about it, it was probably good he was doing it now, since he felt pretty sure there would come a time when he wouldn't be able to rely on Josh for anything.


	2. Just Got Served

**Chapter 2 - Just Got Served (Posted 12 February 2011)**

It was a day like every other. Drake sat in the kitchen, eating the dinner he'd prepared for himself. His mother rarely cooked anymore. And he really couldn't ask Josh to make him anything. So he'd been forced to experiment and figure out how to cook for himself. He wasn't very good, but it was edible and it wasn't too bad.

Tonight he'd settled on eggs. So what if they were a breakfast food? He liked them and they were fairly easy to prepare.

As he was eating, he heard his mother come in the front door. No matter how much he loved his mom, he really didn't feel like talking to her. He quickly shoved he rest of his food in his mouth and ducked behind the counter so she wouldn't see him. When he heard her walk into the kitchen, he crawled around so he could stay hidden, and when she turned around to open the fridge, he made a run for it.

He went up to his room and saw Josh reading on his bed. He smiled at him, and got a small smile _and_ a nod in return. He thought about saying something, but decided against it. He knew Josh would most likely ignore him, so he decided just to climb into bed and work on his homework instead.

It was weird that he still felt comfortable with Josh. Sometimes he felt awkward, but he'd gotten used to Josh not talking to him. He guessed he was just glad he still had Josh around. It felt like every day he slipped further and further away, so any sign that he was still there was cherished.

He heard the front door go again and then he heard Walter's voice.

"Audrey, I can't believe you'd stoop so low!" his muffled yell floated into Drake's ears.

"You gave me no choice!" she screamed back.

"You didn't have to have me _served_* at work! In front of my colleagues, my boss...!"

"Well, you're never home! How else was I supposed to get your attention!"

"That doesn't have anything to do with this!"

"It has _everything_ to do with this! It's one of the main reasons I'm divorcing you!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

Drake suddenly realized he was crying when he saw a few tears fall onto his homework.

He'd been doing that a lot lately. The tears would just sneak up on him, giving no warning. He didn't know if anyone was aware of it, but he thought someone must know as it had happened in public quite a number of times. But no one said anything to him. And like so many other painful things in his life right now, he'd learned to live with it. It didn't even surprise him anymore.

So he wiped his eyes casually and went back to working on his math homework. He didn't risk glancing over at Josh. He wasn't sure whether Josh had seen him cry or not, but it didn't matter. Their parents were divorcing. The end of the world had come.

**A/N: Ok I know this is short and I just posted the first chapter a few hours ago, but I wanted to put it up as soon as possible because it might be a week or two until I update any of my stories. I'm not abandoning them or anything, but I just found out that I probably won't be able to afford to go to college, so I'm kind of at a loss for inspiration right now. I'll find my muse eventually, but I'm gonna take some time off to figure a few things out.**

***Served - I'm not sure how familiar any of you may be with this term. I'm sure you all know it, but in case you don't, it's when divorce papers are brought to your workplace and you're told in front of everyone that your spouse has filed for divorce.**


	3. The Good, The Bad, The Painful

**Chapter 3 - The Good, The Bad, The Painful (Posted 19 February 2011)**

**A/N: I went shopping today and saw a woman that looked like Mrs. Hayfer which got my spirits high enough to write this chapter lol :D Plz enjoy and don't forget to review!**

"Drake!" Megan caught him just as he was about to walk out the door.

It was the morning after he'd heard their mom say she was divorcing Walter, and he didn't want to have to face Josh. It was super early, like a whole hour before he even had to leave for school, but he didn't want to stick around. He felt like an intruder in his own home, uncomfortable within the walls of the place he thought was his home. But they felt like they were caving in on him, crumbling like everything else in his life. Who would want to stay in a house like that? Certainly not Drake.

"What?" he asked quietly, as if maybe he would just disappear if she didn't hear him.

"What's wrong with you?" Megan asked with sadness in her eyes. "You don't even notice when I prank you anymore. You don't answer when someone says your name, I've been talking to you for ten minutes and you haven't responded at all! You just sulk around the house, stay in your room all the time... and you and Josh don't even talk anymore..."

"I don't sulk."

"Wow. Those are the most words I've heard you say in weeks." Megan said. "But seriously, did you do something to piss Josh off again?"

"You shouldn't say words like 'piss' Megan." Drake said casually.

"I'll say it if I want to. But come on, just tell me what you did and I'll help you fix it. I can't stand when you to fight. You don't even fight, you just... don't do _anything_... I hate how you get when this happen. It scares me..."

"I didn't do anything."

"Well then he did something!" Megan prompted with big eyes. "Tell me what it is! I'll..."

"He didn't do anything either."

"Oh, come on." Megan put her hand on her hip. "I know you two. One of you _had_ to have done _something_."

"Nope."

"Then... what's wrong? He's your brother... why won't you talk to each other?"

"He has no reason to talk to me. He's not our brother anymore." Drake said, admitting it to himself for the first time.

"What do you mean? Did he say he was done with you again? I swear I'll kick that boy's ass from here to Tuesday..." Megan put up a fist.

"Megan, don't say 'ass' it's not nice." Drake said. Then he looked at her. He thought she heard their parents' arguments too. But her lack of knowledge on the situation told him otherwise. "You... didn't hear..."

"Hear what?" Megan asked cautiously.

"Mom and... Walter were fighting last night..." Drake couldn't call him Dad. He wasn't his dad anymore. That's the second father he's driven away.

"So what? They've been fighting forever."

"You really didn't hear what they said?"

"No..."

"Megan... Mom and Walter are getting a divorce."

Megan's eyes went wide. But then she shook her head. "Drake, they've been saying that just as long as they've been fighting. They never mean it."

"You don't understand. Mom filed. She had him _served_ at work! It's over, Megan. Walter isn't our dad anymore and Josh _isn't_ our brother. That's why we're not talking. _He_ knew it was coming. _I_ refused to acknowledge that I knew it too."

"But..." Megan actually let some tears bead on her cheeks. "That still doesn't explain why you and Josh aren't talking."

"Yes it does." Drake said like it should have been obvious. He was pretty sure that even if he wasn't as intelligent as he was now, he would have been able to figure it out as soon as he knew Josh wouldn't be his brother anymore. "We're not brothers anymore. There's no reason for him to talk to me now. He doesn't have to put up with me at all now that we're not family. It's just gone back to how it was before our parents got married. We don't talk."

"What? So... it's like all those years you've spent together... don't mean anything to you?"

"It's not me. Josh is the best thing that's ever happened to me. But he doesn't want to be bothered with me anymore. And I have no right to expect anything of him anymore. I don't want to force him into talking to me. I'm happy with any smile or word he'll spare for me. But I..." Why was he telling all this to his little sister? She didn't need to be burdened with this. But it was so hard to keep it in. And when he said one thing, it just pushed the next thing out, creating a flood of thoughts that turned into words. He had to stop himself. But he couldn't. "I don't understand why he wants it this way... I thought things were good between us. I thought we would have stayed friends even if our parents split, you know, I just assumed... but I guess I just need to face the facts. He was only pretending to be so close to me. He was just tolerating me, trying to make it through this whole brother thing until he could get out of it. And now... he's free of me."

"But Drake... he's... I thought... you two were like ultimate brothers. Always there for each other. Josh wouldn't just give up on you like that..." Megan choked.

"Well, I don't think he sees it as giving up on me. Josh doesn't do anything half-heartedly, even if he doesn't really enjoy it. If there's something he's got to do, he does his best until the very end. And that's what he's done. He's been the best brother ever, the best friend I could have asked for. And now it's the end. It's over. He doesn't have to do it anymore."

"Drake, I can't believe Josh would do something so... heartless... doesn't he know how he's affected your life?"

"Does it matter?" Drake asked sincerely. He didn't think it did. It was over. Nothing more could be done.

"Yes! Drake... you're not a quitter! Go talk to him right now!"

"No."

"Drake!"

"No!" Drake said loudly without quite yelling. He didn't want to yell at Megan. None of this was her fault. She may have pulled pranks on them sometimes. Well, all the time, really. But she was always there when it counted. But Drake? He wasn't always there.

"Well... what are you going to do?"

"I was just on my way to school when you stopped me." Drake said, hoisting up his heavy backpack to show her.

"I meant about Josh."

"Nothing."

"You can't just do nothing."

"I can. And I will."

"But you love him! _I _love him!"

"So? Megan... I'm sure he'll still be willing to talk to you. It's _me_ he wants nothing to do with."

"That's... that's so..."

Drake turned around and walked out the door, slamming it shut before she finished the thought. He had to get out. He could have sworn the walls had literally started moving towards him. So it was off to school. Off to earn another A+ that would go unnoticed by everyone except his teachers, which were just as confused as he was, albeit for different reasons.


	4. I'll Huff And I'll Puff

**Chapter 4 - I'll Huff And I'll Puff (Posted 21 February 2011)**

**A/N: Hello everyone :D I'm back from my break, although I didn't really break from this story. I've been writing like crazy today because I had a pretty good day. So please enjoy chapter four and don't be shy with the reviews!**

Drake came home from school that day planning on going right up to his room to work on homework. He had a paper due in two weeks and wanted to begin working on it straight away, that way if he ever ran out of homework he could spend any free time wracking his brain for ways to improve it. It was an infallible plan, really.

But when he walked in, he saw his Mom standing at the table with Walter. Josh and Megan were sat at the table, looking sad and scared.

"Drake, honey. Welcome home." Audrey said sweetly. "Please, sit down with Josh and Megan."

Drake started to sit down, promising himself he would go along with it. But when he saw the tears starting to roll out of Megan's eyes even as she squeezed them so tightly, he know he couldn't. "I don't have to."

"Drake, sit down." Audrey said a bit more harshly.

"I said, I don't have to. I already know what you're going to say."

"You can't possibly know that." Walter said with an obviously faked chuckle.

"Oh yeah?" Drake said angrily. If they were gonna end it, they weren't going to be able to do it their way. "Well what if I told you I _heard_ you last night? And _every_ night for that matter! Huh? I already _know_ what you're doing. You don't have to sit me down with Josh and Megan and stand there next to Walter pretending we're all one big happy family until you break the news to us. I heard you . _We all_ heard you. So save your acting for someone else."

"Drake... son... I know this is hard for you..." Audrey said, shocked.

"You know what? I don't even care! I've seen this coming for a while now and I'm not surprised or upset at all." Drake said with a crazy smile. "I guess I always knew, somewhere deep in my subconscious, that this would never last. That this.. this... 'family' we claimed to be was never really real."

"Oh, sweety..." Audrey made like she was going to hug him, but he batted her arms away.

"Mom, save it. I don't have time to listen to your bullshit. I've got homework to do, so if you'll excuse me."

"Homework?" Josh said, causing everyone to gasp.

Drake looked over at him and saw the shock and disbelief in his eyes. "Yeah, tons of it. I'm not the least bit surprised that none of you noticed the decrease in detentions, the lack of phone calls from upset teachers and the principal, or the increase in my vocabulary. I'm not even surprised you overlooked the acceptance letters _and_ scholarship offers from colleges. But I am surprised that you missed the papers I've been hanging on the fridge. It's filled with tests and essays and all sorts of assignments that I've not only done and handed in on time, but actually got A's on. I put them there thinking maybe someone would see it and care. Maybe one of you would feel proud of me enough to congratulate me or at least acknowledge it. But no, none of you noticed. So I'm going to go up to my room, work my ass off to complete these assignments to the best of my ability, and go to sleep. I don't want to see _any_ of you or talk to any of you or even be _near_ you." Then his eyes panned over to his sister, looking horrified. He softened his eyes and lowered his voice, speaking to her calmly. "Except for you, Megan. Thanks for worrying about me. And I'm sorry if any of that hurt your feelings, I didn't mean you. Even you, Josh, that wasn't directed at you either. Just Mom and Walter. You guys are supposed to be my parents, and you don't even care about me."

"But..." Audrey was at a loss for words. What does a mother say to her son in such a situation?

"No buts, Mom." Drake said. "You know what, I'm not even upset at Walter, given the circumstances. He's got no reason to care about my grades. It's all you, Mom. You're so busy hating Walter that you didn't even have time to love your son. Nice. Really makes me feel good, you know? Knowing that. I know this is hard on you, but you're supposed to be there for me. And you weren't. You're not. So don't you dare expect anything of me at this point."

"Drake, wait..." his mother called as he went to go to his room.

"No. I'm done waiting. I'm done waiting for things to get better. I'm through listening to your excuses. I'm sorry, Mom, but I can't deal with any of this right now. And I really do have homework. So goodnight." he said crossly as he left the room.

"Did either of you know he was actually doing his schoolwork?" Audrey asked, ashamed of herself.

Both Josh and Megan shook their heads.

So, it was true. Even when he went out of his way to show his mom how good he was now, she still didn't see it. All he wanted to do was gain her acceptance. That's all he's ever wanted, especially since he started drifting farther and farther from Josh. But even this didn't make her happy.

But Drake decided it didn't matter. His Mom wasn't much of a mom lately anyway. Why should he seek her approval? All that mattered was that he was making a future for himself. And in just a few months, he'd be on his way to college, far, far away. He'd finally get away from these crumbling walls.

Drake sat on his bed, completely focused on his work, when there was a knock at the door. He didn't answer, hoping whoever it was wold think he was asleep or something and would just leave him alone. But instead the door creaked open slowly.

"Drake?" Josh said from the doorway.

Drake looked up from his homework, if only to confirm that it was indeed Josh's voice that had spoken to him.

It was.

"Yeah, Josh?" Drake said hoarsely, throat still raw from yelling at his mom.

"I think we need to talk."

"I disagree." Drake said. He just knew that whatever Josh said to him would be like a fatal blow. He knew that he was already living in a house of straw as it was; anything Josh could possibly say to him would be the wind that blew it all away, leaving nothing in its wake. Not debris, no destruction, no rubble. Just... nothing.

"Well, I don't. We haven't talked in who knows how long."

"So?" Really, why was it such a big deal whether they talked or not? Drake didn't think it was a big deal. Sure, he was sad, but he knew it was happening and had already accepted it and was moving on. Why did everyone feel the need to keep dragging him back into it?

"So, don't you care that our parents are splitting up?"

"Of course I care. But they're not our parents anymore, Josh. It's my mom, and your dad. There's nothing holding us together, no link between us. So why bother?"

"But, you know... I've come to think of your mom as my mom too..."

"Yeah... and Walter's been my dad. But I've lost a father before. It's nothing new to me."

"But my dad was a _good_ dad."

"True. But the fact remains that he's _your_ dad and not mine. I don't expect him to stick around for my sake, and I don't expect that from you, either."

"You don't?" Josh said lowly.

"Of course not. I haven't been the greatest son or the greatest brother, so I don't hold you to any of the promises you made when we were family. That would be wrong of me."

"It wouldn't be wrong..." Josh said lightly.

"Josh... you're a really great person. But you don't have to pretend for my sake. This is your chance to get away from me. You'll never have to put up with me and my silliness again."

"So... you're not upset that I don't... want anything to do with you anymore?"

Drake felt a tiny ache in his chest, reminiscent of the last time he'd heard Josh say those words. But that time it was in anger, and they'd made up. This time it was simply a matter of personalities. Now that they weren't brothers, there weren't compatible as friends. Both agreed that it was better this way.


	5. The Way It Once Was

**Chapter 5 - The Way It Once Was (Posted 22 February 2011)**

Drake stood in his living room as he watched the movers took everything that had become part of his home. But they weren't part of _his_ home. All these things either belonged to Josh or Walter.

The television.

The game sphere.

The china cabinet.

The stereo.

The father that had actually treated him like a son.

The brother who had stuck up for him so many times.

None of those things were his. Not anymore. He mentally smacked himself, reminding himself that those things were never his, and that it was only a matter of time until they were taken away from him.

He laughed out loud. Like this was all some sick joke set up by the heavens or the fates or whatever controlled his life. A joke that had been so carefully crafted, it was just under his nose yet he couldn't detect that something was off.

His room seemed completely bare. Pretty much exactly as it had been before Josh had moved in, it felt so different. So cold and foreign.

Josh's bed was still there. That would be taken tomorrow, since they could only have the movers for a certain amount of time today. But once that was gone, the open floor he'd once been so fond of would seem like the darkest abyss, pulling him in deeper and deeper, farther and farther from everything that he held dear.

He stared at the bed. He remembered being furious when it was brought there. Yelling things like "there's no room!" or "why can't he keep sleeping on the sofa?" and "why does this always happen to me?"

But he didn't realize then that any of this would be happening. That he would actually be sad at the thought of that bed being taken away. Because that would mean he'd have no choice but to admit that Josh was gone. Gone. Forever. No longer his brother. No longer his friend. He was nothing to Josh.

Nothing.

Drake Parker wasn't nothing. _I'm brilliant_, he thought to himself, _I'm gonna be great someday_. That's what he kept telling himself. He said it every day and every night, so he would have the strength to focus on his school work.

But everyone has their weak spot. And Drake's was people. And junk food, but that was hardly substantial in a situation such as this. Drake had a hard time keeping people in his life. His real father. His girlfriends. His step-brother. His friends. His step-father. His mother. It seemed like the only one he had left was Megan. And he figured it was only a matter of time until she lost interest in him just like everyone else had.

And Drake wasn't so proud that he couldn't admit when he broke. It was an extremely rare occurrence for Drake to just fall apart. And he always picked himself up and rebuilt himself, trying not to let anyone notice that he was in pain. But it happened. And it was happening now.

Staring down at that bed. The bed where the single-most important person in his life used to sleep every night.

He didn't know why he did it, but he climbed into the bed and wrapped himself in the cushy blankets. He felt odd at first, laying in Josh's bed. But it was the only comfort he could find right now. And it would be gone tomorrow, so this was his last chance to feel Josh's presence. Ever.

Drake surprised himself by falling asleep quickly. He woke the next morning feeling more rested than he'd been in a long while. He was still exhausted, but he felt better than usual.

He went to school, kicking butt at everything as usual, and feeling so proud of himself when he did well. When he returned home, he ducked into the kitchen and removed all the papers he'd hung there. Even after he specifically pointed out that they were there, no one said anything to him.

Maybe they thought he was faking it. Maybe they thought he was just craving attention.

But really, what was so wrong with wanting attention? He thought he deserved a little. Some small words of encouragement, some credit for all his hard work. But it never came.

Heading back up to his room, he saw the door was open. He peeked inside, knowing full well what he would see, but still feeling a sinking feeling when his suspicions were confirmed.

Josh's bed was gone.

He looked around the room, examining it carefully. He tried to find a sign, any sort of evidence to say that Josh had been there. _Anything_ to prove they'd once been brothers. But except for a few pictures in his desk drawer which he dared not look through, no one would even be able to guess the two boys had ever had anything to do with each other.

And that's just how he wanted it.


	6. The Good Life

**Chapter 6 - The Good Life (Posted 24 February 2011)**

Over the next few weeks, Drake held onto a shred of hope that Josh would call. Or text. Or email. Or write. Or visit. Or anything. But when weeks turned to months, he knew that was never going to happen.

Summer came and went quickly, dragging him from high school to college. And if Drake was ever thankful for anything, it was college. He was going to school all the way on the other side of the country. And he didn't have to pay a cent, all of it was covered by scholarships he'd earned throughout his short time as an academic student.

He was all ready to goodbye to his mom. They'd never gotten as close as they once were, but they did manage to work things out. He no longer felt that he was a disappointment to her, he simply felt that she didn't care either way what happened to him. So he had no problem leaving her.

At the last minute, Megan asked to go with him.

"What?" Drake said as he stood in the living room, almost done packing. "Megan, you can't come with me. You have to stay here."

"I can't stay here!" Megan said. "I already lost one brother, I'm not going to lose you too! You're taking me with you!"

"But what about school? And what about mom? You can't just leave her here all by herself." Drake retorted.

"Why not? You are." Megan argued. "And you can enroll me in school there. I'll live in your apartment with you. I'll help you with chores and I'll even get a job if you want me to... just please let me come with you."

Drake had to admit, as odd as it sounded, having his sister around would make him a bit happier. While his relationships with everyone else deteriorated, he actually grew closer to her. They were both feeling the same hurt. They had to stick together.

"Well, Mom? What do you think?"

"Megan... you... you don't want to stay here?"

"I'm sorry mom. It's just that... this place... I just have to get away. I can't take it here anymore. I want to go with Drake."

Drake looked at the pleas in his sister's eyes as she looked at him and their mom. "I'm alright with it." Drake said, changing his mind easily. "You don't have to get a job, though. I've got plenty of money."

"Well... if you're both sure..." Audrey stammered. "There really isn't anything I can do to stop you. But Drake, this means you're Megan's legal guardian now. You need to take care of her and be a parent, not just a brother."

"I can do that." Drake said. He already was like a parent to Megan. He had been since their father left. His responsibilities had vaporized after Walter entered the picture, but once he was gone as well Drake had stepped back in and resumed his parental duties. It wouldn't be totally different being her sole caretaker.

"Ok..." Audrey said sadly. "I'll get you another plane ticket. You should probably pack some basic necessities, Megan, then I'll ship out whatever else you'll need later."

"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!" Megan jumped up and ran to her room, quickly throwing clothes and other things into two travel bags.

"Are you sure about this, Drake?" Audrey said reservedly.

"I can take care of my own sister, Mom. We'll be fine. I'll make sure she eats healthy and does all her school work and everything. It might actually be fun to have her there with me."

"Well... I'd better get that ticket." his mom said and picked up the phone.

A mere two hours later, Drake and Megan were on a plane to Pennsylvania, where Drake would be attending Penn State.


	7. Intrusion

**Chapter 7 - Intrusion (Posted 25 February 2011)**

**A/N: My goal is usually to wait until I have at least 3 reviews for a chapter before I post another one. So this is my thank you for making me so happy because I got three reviews on the previous chapter already!**

Drake was asleep on the sofa in his apartment. He'd been too tired the previous night to make the long journey from there to his bedroom.

There was really no reason for him to be exhausted. In three short weeks he'd be receiving his bachelor's degrees both in Biology _and_ Music Production. He only had one seminar left to attend, and then he was done.

But he forced himself to wake up. Megan was supposed to be getting home around this time, and he always liked to be awake when she came home. She was an adult now, just about ready to graduate high school herself, but since she still lived with him he liked to treat her like she was still a kid.

He didn't hound her about her homework or anything. She was a good student, so all he had to do was keep track of her grades and go to the teacher conferences. And it made him so proud to hear the teachers tell him how bright she was and what a good future she had ahead of her.

He knew he hadn't been Megan's legal guardian for a very long time, but he was so proud of her. And he always made sure to tell her that, too. He had a lot he was proud of now. He was happy with his life. And he was, of course, overjoyed when Harvard Law School extended a full scholarship to his sister. He knew she was going to make one hell of a lawyer.

When Drake heard a knock on the door he laughed. Opening it, he said, "Forget your key again, Megan?"

"Yeah, sorry. I was on my way out with Nathaniel this morning and just forgot to grab the keys." Megan said as she walked into the apartment with a toddler in her arms.

"Oh yeah, why didn't you leave Nate here? I told you I had a day off today." Drake said.

"Well, you know, you don't get days off very often. And since Mrs. Pepperidge doesn't mind watching him while I'm at school, I thought it'd be nice if you got to sleep in without having to worry about taking care of him."

"Oh, but I don't mind." Drake said happily, grabbing the little boy and tickling his chin. "I love taking care of my nephew."

"You know, you'd think after two years that wouldn't surprise me anymore." Megan rolled her eyes.

"I just can't believe he's gonna be two tomorrow." Drake said as he cuddled Megan's son.

"I know. My little boy's growing up so fast."

"I hungry." the little boy said.

"Aww, you're hungry?" Drake said with a silly face. "Uncle Jake'll get you a cookie!" Drake had altered his name shortly after moving to Pennsylvania. Jared Drake Parker had had an identity crisis. He wanted to forget his old life, and that meant leaving the name Drake behind. But he couldn't resume using his real given name because the whole reason he stopped using it was so he'd have no visible ties to his biological father. So he'd ended up just mixing them together to form a common name, Jake Parker, in hopes that he could start a new life and not be found among the numerous other people who shared the common name.

"Yay, cookie!" Nathaniel clapped.

"No cookies!" Megan said.

"Come on, Megs, it's early and they're sugar-free. Please, can't he have _one_ cookie?" Drake pouted.

"Fine, just one. You know we're having cake and ice cream tomorrow, though, don't you?."

"Well yeah, it is his birthday."

"Did Mom's flight land yet?"

"Oh, no, I knew there was something I needed to tell you. Her flight got rerouted and she's landing somewhere else. She said she's just going to get a hotel there and drive down tomorrow afternoon."

"Ok, then. That means I'm going to be all alone tomorrow morning." Megan said sadly.

"You aren't going to school?"

"No! It's my son's second birthday! I'm not going to waste it at school." Megan saw the pensive look on her brother's face as she said this. "Jake, you know I don't skip school _at all_. Tomorrow is important to me."

"I know. And taking a day off school is good once in a while anyway." he admitted. "I was thinking about ditching as well."

"You can't! Tomorrow is the last class you ever have to attend! And it's part of your duty as vice president of your class to attend and introduce the guest speaker."

"I don't even know who the guest speaker is!" he said, frustrated. "I know it's supposed to be a surprise, but you'd think they would at least tell the president, who would then tell _me_."

"Because you're sleeping with him." Megan commented.

"That was one time, and it's not the point!" he shook his head.

"Tell me again why you two broke up? You seemed to really like each other." Megan watched fondly as her son ate the cookie her brother handed him.

"He's weird. And not in a good way."

"But, you're still friends, right?"

"Ew, no. I can't stand him."

"So why would he have told you who the guest speaker is then?" Megan asked, confused.

"Because, he follows me everywhere _and_ tells me all kinds of secrets he's not supposed to tell anyone. I think he thinks it'll win me back, but I'm sorry, the guy is a creep."

"I know how that goes." Megan said sadly.

"Aw, don't think about that, Megan." Drake said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "I know Pryce was a scum bag and I'm so sorry he ran out on you. But look what you have, you have your son. If you hadn't met Pryce, you wouldn't have Nate."

"I know. And I love him so much." Megan said, practically squishing the boy as she hugged him. "Mommy loves you, Nathaniel."

"Love Mommy!" Nate screamed giddily.

"You are so cute!" Drake tickled the little boy, making him giggle loudly. "Yes you are! Yes you are!"

"Do you even know what the seminar is about?"

"No." Drake said, glum again. "They were afraid to tell us because we might be able to figure out who it is, and then it would ruin the surprise. All we know is it's a biology seminar, and we only know that because that's the name of the class."

X

The next morning, Drake hugged Megan and gave Nathaniel a kiss on the forehead before rushing out the door to attend his last ever seminar as an undergraduate.

Arriving a half hour before the seminar was scheduled to begin, Drake begged to be told whom he was introducing. Unfortunately, they would not give him the slightest clue. All they did was give him a short introduction speech to rehearse, and when it was time to say the speaker's name, it would appear on a cue card held up down in front of the stage. Then he need only shake the speaker's hand as they walked onto the stage and he could just sit and listen.

He agreed, remembering that he would find out soon and then he'd listen to this professor or this scientist or whatever he or she was for one miniscule little hour, and then he'd be free until graduation.

Drake rehearsed his speech and memorized it after only a few minutes. The rest of the time was spend pacing back and forth in anticipation. As much as he usually loathed these guest-speaker seminar classes, he was pretty excited for this one. He didn't know if it was because it was his final one or because of the suspense of not knowing who the speaker actually was or some combination of both. All he knew that by the time he had to get up on the stage and introduce the speaker, he was totally pumped.

"Good morning, fellow students." Drake said confidently into the microphone. "Jake Parker, senior class vice president, here to welcome you all to the final class of the year. Many of you will be graduating in a few days, and many more of you will be returning next year. But no matter what, I'm proud to have spent my last four years here getting to know all of you, and I wish you all the best of luck in whatever future lies ahead. And now without further ado, please welcome the guest speaker..." Drake searched for the cue card. He saw the tech chief holding a big white piece of cardboard. He waited as it was turned over and he read the name, not quite realizing who it was until the words were already rolling off his lips. "Dr. Joshua Nichols..." his voice dropped on the last syllable when he heard himself say the name.

This had to be some mistake. Surely it wasn't Josh, the Josh he thought he'd left behind all those years ago. It couldn't be _that_ Josh.

But as the guest speaker walked out on stage, brandishing a blinding smile and sauntering confidently with his arm outstretched to shake Drake's hand, there was no denying this was the same Josh.

Josh didn't seem to notice anything was awry even after he grabbed Drakes hand and began shaking it. But then he locked eyes with the man staring at him, saw the fear and the sadness there, hidden haphazardly behind swishy locks of golden brown hair.

Both let go at the same time, having realized that the other knew who they were. They stared at each other for just a second more, but then Drake looked away and walked awkwardly off the stage.

Knowing he was being paid a lot and his reputation was always on the line, Josh began the seminar straight away. He looked for Drake in the crowd but didn't see him anywhere. But the lights were so bright shining on him that he couldn't really make out the faces of anyone. He didn't know if Drake was out there. Hell, he didn't know _why_ Drake had been there in the first place. But he was going to find him. He'd been searching for him since they went their separate ways, and he wasn't about to let him slip away again.

**A/N: I forget how much younger Megan is than Drake, so I don't really know what grade she'd be in and I didn't feel like looking it up lol. So, for the sake of this story, she graduates high school the same year Drake graduates college.**


	8. The Family Man Can

**Chapter 8 - The Family Man Can (Posted 27 February 2011)**

**A/N: I just wanted to thank everyone for the reviews! You guys are so good to me xD  
**

Drake sat in the audience, watching and listening as Josh delivered his presentation on the rare allele he'd discovered in his lab research. Of course Drake had known about Josh's success in the scientific world, and of course he recognized the irony that they'd both ended up studying the same thing. But he'd ignored it, citing Josh's research professionally and purposefully overlooking the name so as to keep himself sane.

He was almost sick as he watched his ex-step-brother speak so easily while he was a mess in the audience. But of course he had to stay, he couldn't just leave. He had responsibilities! That, and he just couldn't bring himself to leave without saying something to Josh. Even if it was one word and he received no response whatsoever, he had to say _something_.

In all honesty, the lecture was highly fascinating. But even though Drake was interested in the subject matter, he had a hard time focusing.

When the hour was up, Josh thanked the audience for having him, bowed, and left the stage.

Drake stood without waiting for the closing speech and went backstage.

He saw Josh standing and speaking with one of the security officers. He was right there. So close. All Drake had to do was walk over and tap him on the shoulder. He desperately wanted to talk to Josh. Only... he couldn't.

Because Josh didn't want him anymore. That's what he'd said all those years ago. And, as much as it hurt Drake to do so, he had no choice but to respect that. So he walked away.

X

Josh was thanking the security crew leader for doing such a good job, when suddenly he had the strangest sensation that he was being watched. Turning around, he saw an extremely slim figure disappearing from the stage exit door.

Drake. He'd seen Drake for the first time in four and a half years. But how? Why? Did Drake somehow search for him and find him there? But how did he get in? And why was he the one introducing him? And why would he just leave?

Josh followed him. Without warning he just ran from the security officer toward the exit door, catching it just before it closed all the way. He peeked out, looking for Drake. He spotted someone rounding a corner and sprinted after him.

It was him. It was Drake. Drake was running from him, faster than Josh had ever seen him run before. Josh sped up, trying with all his might to catch up to him, but it was too late. Drake slid into a car and zoomed off, leaving Josh panting in the college parking lot.

Well, that wasn't going to stop Josh. He'd wondered what it'd be like to see Drake again. After all this time of wishing he could just talk to him, he finally had the chance and he blew it.

He'd searched for him for so long. He tried asking Audrey where he went to college, but she moved. He couldn't find her, which meant he couldn't find Drake. But now he knew he was here, somewhere. And he was going to find out exactly where if it was the last thing he'd ever do.

X

Drake drove home in a hurry, praying to the God he sometimes believed in that Josh wouldn't be following him.

Running into the apartment complex, he paused to catch his breath and rub away the tears he'd been crying since he left the school. Once he pulled himself together, he made his way back to his apartment.

Megan was on the sofa watching television. Nathaniel was asleep on her lap.

"Hey," she said as he walked in, "I didn't think you'd be home so early."

"Yeah, well, I had to get out of there." Drake said, pouring himself a glass of soda.

"Why, Jake, did something happen?"

"Megan, you wouldn't believe who..."

Knock, knock, knock. The light raps on the door could only be made by one person.

"Who could that be? Mom won't be here for another hour yet."

"Shh," Drake insisted, then whispered, "be quiet. Pretend we're not home." He ducked behind the kitchen counter. He knew who it was. He didn't know how he found him, but he did.

"Jake, you're being silly. Answer the door." Megan chuckled.

Knock, knock, knock.

When Drake refused to get up, Megan sighed and carefully lifted Nate into her arms. She walked over to the door and opened it before Drake could tackle her.

"Megan!" Josh screamed when he saw her, completely overlooking the sleeping baby in her arms.

She quickly tore her bewildered eyes away from her once step-brother to glance at her son. Thankfully he was still sleeping. She smacked him.

"What was that for?" he asked, wounded.

"Don't talk so loud! Did you not notice the sleeping toddler?"

"Aaw, he's so cute!" Josh said highly. "So, you still babysit?"

"Josh, what are you doing here?" she answered, avoiding his question completely.

"I'm here to talk to Drake. I saw him at a lecture I gave today and had to find out where he lived. It's funny, everyone I asked kept asking if I meant Jake Parker when I asked about him."

"That's because he goes by Jake now." Megan said sternly.

"Oh." Josh said, confused. "That would explain why I could never find him, I guess."

"You've been looking for him?"

"Since a few weeks after my dad and I left, yeah."

Megan looked over at the kitchen counter and saw that Drake must still have been hiding behind it. "Why don't you come in."

"Thanks." Josh said, stepping cautiously into the apartment. "So, what's the kid's name?"

"Nathaniel." Megan said apprehensively.

"Cool. How old is he?"

"He just turned two today." Megan said proudly, letting her motherly sweetness come through. But she changed the subject. "So... why do you want to see Drake? Wow, it feels weird to call him that..."

"I want to apologize to him." Josh said sadly. "I shouldn't have acted the way I did when... when our parents split up. I was just so angry, you know? I was mad because he was my brother and he was the one who helped me get over my awkward stage and he was the one who was always proud of me. And he was being taken away from me. It was like he came in and rearranged my life and then he left! But I know it wasn't his fault. I realized that after a couple days of being away from him. I missed him so bad."

"So, why didn't you call him or visit him or anything?" Megan asked, stroking Nathaniel's hair.

"Because I told him I didn't want anything to do with him."

"Josh!"

"I know! I know I shouldn't have said that. But I thought it would be like the first time I said it. I thought he would come looking for me, and I'd have a chance to apologize."

Megan stared at him. "Have you forgotten that the last time you said that, Drake eventually believed he wasn't good enough to be your brother? Did you really not see how he changed after that? His confidence in himself was ruined. Of course he wasn't going to seek you out! You didn't want him! The last thing he wanted to do was intrude on your life."

"I know. But I didn't realize that until much later. And when I did finally try to call you guys' mom, she'd moved. So there was no way I could just ask anybody where you were. I looked all over for him. Every single Drake Parker or even Jared Parker, I investigated them all. I never would have thought to look for a Jake Parker."

"That was one of the reasons he changed it to that."

"What were the other reasons?" Josh asked.

"It's not my place to tell you, Josh." Megan said sadly.

"But, Megan, I..."

Drake used this opportunity to reveal himself. "I wanted to forget Drake Parker existed."

"Drake..."

"It's Jake now, if you don't mind."

"But, you've always been..." Josh tried to argue.

"Well I'm not anymore. Drake Parker was a whiney, brainless little dreamer that I left behind when I moved here. I'm Jake Parker now, smart and successful. So call me Jake, or I can show you to the door."

"Jeez, no need to get all defensive." Josh said. "Dra... Jake... man, that sounds odd, uh... I just... I wanted to..."

Drake saw him tremble a little. And it almost melted him. He wanted to be strong for himself. He wanted to stay away from Josh and never get his hopes up again. But if Josh wanted him, who was he to deny him?

"I know." Drake said more calmly. "I heard what you said."

"Man, I really am sorry! I miss you so much and... I... well... if you really want me to leave I will... the last thing I want to do is upset you." Josh said honestly. "But, please, just know that I miss you and if you ever decide you want to forgive me..."

"I already forgave you." Drake said with a twitch of his nose.

"You did?"

"Yeah. We may not be brothers anymore, but I never wanted to lose your friendship." Drake looked into his big, sparkling eyes. "And if you really meant all those things you said, I don't care about anything else. Having you in my life is more important than any of that." Drake spoke from his heart. All the things he's thought about Josh, the anger, the sorrow. It was all gone as he watched the man smile.


	9. Different But The Same

**Chapter 9 - Different But The Same (Posted 4 March 2011)**

Josh beamed at Drake. He was so happy that he was forgiven. "Thank you."

"Don't worry about it." Drake said, feeling a strange tightening in his chest at the sight of Josh's glistening smile. He hadn't seen that smile in so long; he'd been sure he never would again. And now there it was, right in front of him, a gesture of friendship.

"So, what are you doing here?" Josh asked, not wanting to be rude but also not wanting to beat around the bush.

"I live here." Drake answered.

"Oh. Yeah, I guess I should have realized that." Josh chuckled and looked around the apartment. "Does Megan live with you?"

"I do." Megan said. "I wanted to get my own place a while ago... but Jake helps me with... well, it's easier just living with him."

"That's cool. It's nice to see you two so close."

"Yeah. That's probably one of the few good things that came out of this." Drake said softly. "Even though I feel more like her dad than her brother."

"That's because legally you _are_ my guardian. Or were, before I turned 18." Megan said. "But yeah, we are really close. And I'm really glad for that."

"Cool. So, I guess the question I really wanted to ask was why were you at my lecture?" Josh asked seriously.

"I didn't know it was your lecture." Drake said defensively. "It was top secret, classified information. None of the students were allowed to know. Not even the vice president of the senior class!"

"Wait, you're a _student _at Penn State?"

"Yes. Is that so hard to believe?" Drake asked, just a tad bit offended.

"Not as much as you being the vice president."

"Josh... I told you. I'm not the lazy neanderthal I was when we were brothers." Drake sounded a little sad. "I'm a top student. And... I know your perception of me is probably still skewed from all those years when you were way smarter than me... but I'm not like that anymore."

"So, you're smarter than me now?" Josh raised an eyebrow, trying to be funny.

"No, I didn't say that. All I mean was I'm not as stupid as I was."

"Dr... Jake... I didn't mean it like that..."

"No, I know." Drake stood and turned so his back was facing Josh and Megan. "I just... It's been so long since we've talked and I still feel... no, never mind." he faced them again. "Josh, I know you're really smart, but so am I and I don't want you to look down on me."

"Ok. I'm sorry. I didn't..." Josh seemed like he didn't know what to say. "Oh... oh my gosh. I just remembered, that day... you said about how your grades were improving and no one even noticed..."

"You remember that?"

"Now." Josh admitted. "I'm proud of you."

Drake stared at him. "What?"

"I said I'm proud of you."

"Proud?"

"Yeah." Josh said goofily. "That's what you call it when you're happy that someone you care about has done something amazing."

"Th... thank you..." It was a rare occasion for anyone to say they were proud of Drake. He couldn't recall his mother saying it, especially not in the last few years. Megan had said it once or twice, but she knew he was capable of being supremely intelligent, so she just expected it.

"You're welcome."

Megan looked at them. She could barely believe this was happening. But she was so happy it was. Even though she was worried about them going their separate ways again, at least this time her brother would have some closure. "Maybe I should leave so you two can talk more."

"You don't have to go." Josh protested.

"I won't be gone long. Maybe a half an hour. We'll meet Mom outside, ok Jake?"

"Your mom's visiting?" Josh asked, surprised.

"Yeah. For the party." Drake said, instantly regretting letting the words slip out of his mouth. He could obviously tell Megan hadn't wanted Josh to know about Nathaniel.

"Party?" Josh asked, curious.

Drake looked over to where Megan stood at the door, clutching her son in one arm while she turned the knob with the other hand. "Go ahead and tell him. He'll find out sooner or later."

"You sure?" Drake asked his sister.

She nodded before exiting.

"What are you supposed to tell me?" Josh asked as he was a little worried.

Drake took the opportunity to sit next to Josh. "Josh... Megan isn't babysitting Nathaniel."

"She's not?"

"No." Drake said, hoping Josh would understand. When he didn't, Drake continued. "Today is Nathaniel's second birthday. Mom is coming for the party."

"Why...?"

"Because... she's his grandmother."

Josh gasped. "Grandmother? You mean...!"

"Yeah."

"Wow. I never would have guessed..." Josh commented.

"I know. I was surprised, you know, when we found out we were gonna have a new addition to the family. And I was scared. But I don't know what I was afraid of. Being an uncle is awesome." Drake said happily.

"Uncle?"

"Yep. That's me. Uncle Jake."

"Wait..." Josh stuttered... "If you're his uncle... that means... he's _Megan's_ son?"

"Duh. What did you think?"

"Well, I..."

"Oh! You thought he was mine?" Drake said, amused.

"Well yeah! You had to go and make it all cryptic when you were telling me! Plus he really looks like you." Josh said, realizing that Nathaniel definitely looked like a Parker baby.

Drake stared at him. And then he started to laugh uncontrollably. "That is just too funny." he kept laughing.

"What is?"

"You thought I was his dad."

"Uh... sorry but... I don't really see the humor in that. Are you making fun of me for thinking that or something?" Josh asked, hurt.

"Oh, no." Drake stopped laughing and put his hand on Josh's shoulder. "That's not why I'm laughing. I'm laughing at the thought of me being a father."

"Why? I think you'd make a great father."

"I agree. I mean, look at how well I raised Megan these past four years. And I'm really good with Nate. But I'll never be a real father."

"Why not?"

"Well... I guess you get two surprises today, Josh." Drake said a little apprehensively. He never thought he'd have to tell Josh this. And now he was afraid it would drive him away again. But he had to tell him. If he lied, it would only make things worse later on. Better to have Josh leave again right away than a few years down the line once they've become closer. "Josh... I never planned on telling you this. Hell, I never planned on admitting it to myself. And if you want to leave again after I say it, please just go. But... here it is. I'm gay."

Josh was blank for a moment. "Gay?"

"Yeah, you know. Queer. Homosexual."

"You?"

"Without a doubt." Drake replied with sad eyes. He was glad Josh wasn't gone yet, but he wasn't getting his hopes up.

"Wow. Does your mom know?"

"Yes. She's pretty fine with it. She wasn't at first, but then I introduced her to my boyfriend at the time and she realized that it isn't a bad thing."

"True. It isn't a bad thing." Josh said, still shocked.

"So, you're not repulsed by me?"

"Of course not. It would be highly hypocritical of me." Josh announced.

"No way." Drake said. "You're... you're gay too?"

"As a campfire singalong." Josh laughed.

"When did you..."

"After I moved out. I'd been wondering for a while and then... well I met this guy and... we hit it off..."

"Wow. I knew in middle school already." Drake said, shaking his head. "Best kept secret of my life."

"You mean all those girls you were with..."

"Part of it was to cover it up. But part of it was because I didn't want to _be_ gay. I wasn't happy about it. But when I moved here, I stopped fighting it and decided that if people can't accept me as I am then they can buzz off."

"Good for you." Josh said proudly. Then he let out another chuckle. "When I told my dad, he said he'd known all alone. How's that for a morale boost."

Drake smiled. He had always kind of wondered if Josh might be gay.

"Have you considered adoption?" Josh asked.

"Huh?"

"Before, you said about being a dad. Have you ever considered adopting a baby?"

"Yeah, of course. But I don't want to do it on my own." Drake said, softening his eyes. "I have to find that special someone first. Someone who will raise the children with me."

"Children?" Josh accented the plural state.

"Yeah. If I could, I'd have a ton of them. A whole mess of happy little faces that I get to take care of and watch as they grow."

"I want that too." Josh admitted. "You know how much I love kids."

"Yeah, you'd be one hell of a father, Josh." Drake said with honest eyes.

"I like to think so. But I'm afraid I'd be too wrapped up in my work. I don't want to adopt a kid and then realize I can't take care of it the right way."

"You? Josh, kids love you. And you may think your job would get in the way, but things would be different once you actually have your own child." Drake sat down on the sofa and patted the seat next to him.

Josh sat and next to him and leaned back. "I don't know. It's a scary thing."

"Sure it is. But take Megan for example. When she found out she was pregnant, she was terrified. She was convinced that she would make a bad mother because she's young and she was still in school and everything. But she's awesome with Nate. I mean, she has me and Mom helping her with anything she needs, but she does all the parenting on her own. She may be a single mom but that boy wouldn't have a better life if he were royalty. I'm sure everything would work out for you as well."

Josh leaned forward and looked at Drake. He knew he was looking at a totally different person than the brother he'd once had; his went by a new name, he lived in a new place, he'd become a primary caregiver, and he'd excelled academically. This wasn't the person he'd stupidly left behind. But his Drake was in there somewhere. And he was glad to have finally found him. "You don't know how good it feels to talk to you like this again."

"I do, actually. It almost feels like we just saw each other yesterday."

"I missed you a lot."

"I missed you too. More than anyone could possibly imagine. I can't tell you how many times I wanted to just pack up and go smack you, demanding you allow me back into your life. But... then I'd remember what you said and... I didn't want to get in your way..."

Josh blinked. There it was. A shadow of Drake from the past. The insecurities he always tried to keep hidden from everyone. "I really am sorry. I swear, as soon as I left I realized I'd made the worst decision in my entire life. And now that I found you I'm not ever going to risk losing you again."

"You care about me that much?"

"You were my best friend. You were there for me through everything. Of course I care about you that much. I admit, maybe you could have done better sometimes, but you were always doing the right thing when it really counted. And as mad as I thought I was whenever you did something stupid, I just made myself mad because I always just forgave you instantly because I knew if you weren't doing that stuff you wouldn't be Drake."

"But... can things still be that way? I mean, despite the increase in confidence, you're still the Josh I remember. But I'm not Drake anymore. I haven't been for a long time."

"I can get over that. So what if you're a little different now? I still..."

Drake squinted as Josh's speech broke off. Why was Josh staring at him? "Still what?"

"I still love you."


	10. A Full Apartment

**Chapter 10 - A Full Apartment (Posted 10 March 2011)**

"What?" Drake asked. He was shocked. He knew he and Josh had been close, but once his mom and Josh's dad split up he'd convinced himself it was just a sham. For four years now he thought the only reason Josh was so good to him was because they were forced to be family. Once the family was gone, so was the love.

"I said I still love you." Josh's voice broke a little, but he didn't let that stop him. "You were my best friend, and to this day I've never had a better friend than you. Even if we're not brothers anymore, I still feel that connection."

"Even after being apart for so long?"

"Of course." Josh scooted a little closer and placed his hand on Drake's shoulder. "I feel closer to you than ever."

"You _are_ sitting right next to me." Drake said with a nervous laugh. He didn't realize he was shifting closer to Josh as well.

"Mmhmm." Josh leaned in and inhaled. He smiled at the smell of Drake's cologne. He may have left most of Drake Parker behind, but he hadn't left his signature odor. He still smelled like soap and junk food.

"Josh..." The word came out as more of a sigh as Drake blinked.

Before either of their brains could process what was happening, they were moving their lips together in a synchronized motion that felt practiced and precise.

"I... am so sorry..." Josh said after they parted.

"Um..." Drake's eyes were wide with fear, but softened when he saw the guilt on Josh's face. "I'm sorry too. I just... it's been a really long time since I've been with anyone..."

"It has?"

"Yeah. Jake Parker isn't nearly as good at getting a date as Drake Parker was."

"You know, those two really aren't that different." Josh said, putting his arm around Drake's shoulder. "You've always been smart. You just needed to start applying yourself more. Other than that, you're still pretty much the same person you've always been."

"I know. That's the sad part." Drake hung his head. "I've tried so hard to leave everything behind. To become better and smarter and stronger. But I'm still the same stupid kid I was all those years ago. I'm still weak and emotional and..."

"Being emotional doesn't make you weak."

"You don't understand. This whole time, my ultimate goal has just been to forget. Everything. I just wanted to forget it all. I wanted to forget how horrible my life was before you came into it and how great it was with you in it. I thought that... that you didn't care about me at all. That our entire relationship was fake. I prayed every night that I would wake up and it would all be gone. But every morning I wake up and it still hurts. I still feel all the pain I felt back then when our family was torn apart. Even now, sitting here... I still feel it."

"I'm sorry." Josh hugged Drake tightly, not hiding the intimacy of the moment. "I didn't want to hurt you."

"I think... deep down... I always knew that." Drake nuzzled into Josh's shoulder shyly. "But I didn't know why you would just give up on me if you cared about me. I had to tell myself something. I didn't know if I would ever see you again, so I forced myself to believe you were gone for good. Everything was so confusing, I just needed to be sure of something, you know? Even if it hurt me, I needed something I could rely on..."

"What if I promise to never let you be hurt again?"

"No one can keep a promise like that, Josh. Not even you."

"But... I've always hated to see you in pain. And... I used to be the person you'd go to to take it away... I want to be that again..."

"I don't know. I really want you here with me. I don't ever want to lose you again. But I don't know what to do. We can't go back to being brothers. But we can't just be friends, can we? Not after a kiss like that... Plus we've never been just friends. We were always closer than that."

"Who says we have to just be friends?"

"What do you mean?" Drake was pretty sure he knew what Josh was suggesting. He just wanted Josh to say it, just to be clear.

"What if we try to be... like... intimate? Like... romantically involved?"

"We can't do that..."

"Why not? We're not brothers. We're not related at all. And... that kiss... it was nice. I think..."

"How many times have we kissed?"

"What?"

"We used to kiss each other a lot. And hug and touch each other. All the time."

"We did, didn't we?" Josh said with a little smile. He moved one of his hands up to rub Drake's neck as they leaned slightly away from each other. "It was nice then, too."

"Yeah. It was."

"Look. I'm not looking for an answer right now. Hell, I'm still shocked that we even kissed right now. But... I mean I just missed you so much... and I always wondered what I'd do if I ever found you again. I never dreamed it would be this... but I'm going to leave the offer open. I do love you. And if it could be... that kind of love... I'm willing to give it a chance if you are..."

"I don't know, Josh..." Drake closed his eyes in thought.

"It's fine if you don't want to. I'd still like to stay in your life..."

"I want you in my life, there's no doubt about that." Drake insisted. "I want you with me. I just don't know about..."

"Jake... take your time. I'm not going to leave you or anything."

"Thanks." Drake let himself be held tightly by Josh for a few minutes. He'd missed the feeling of Josh's touch for so long. Having it on him again was a kind of bliss he never thought he'd experience. He just wanted it to have Josh's arms around him forever. But did that mean he wanted to become _involved_ with Josh?

Just when Drake was about to lean further into Josh's embrace, there was a knock at the door.

"Jake," Megan's voice floated through the door cautiously, "Mom's here. Can we come in?"

"Yeah, I'm coming to the door." Drake yelled. Then he looked up at Josh and quietly said, "The door locks when it shuts, so I have to let them in."

Josh nodded and released Drake. Drake stood. "Are you going to stay for the party?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Yes." Drake said with a squeak. "But, if you're going to be uncomfortable... you can sneak out through the window in the bathroom, it goes to the fire escape."

"If you want me to stay, I will." Josh smiled.

Drake smiled back at him and went to open the door. "Hey Mom."

Josh washed as Audrey threw her arms around her son happily. "Hey, sweetie! Sorry I couldn't be here sooner, but I'm here now."

"It's good to see you, Mom." Drake said as they released each other.

"It's good to see you too, hun." Audrey set her purse on the counter, still not noticing Josh sitting on the sofa. She turned to Megan and stuck her arms out. "Now, I want to hold my grandson." She smiled brightly as Megan handed Nate to her. "Jake, it's about time you gave me some grandchildren too."

"Mom, not again." Drake sighed. "You know I'm not going to have kids until I find the right guy to raise them with."

"You're not looking hard enough."

"Oh, is that what my problem is this time? I'm too picky or I'm not looking hard enough or I'm not serious enough or I'm too serious or I'm too needy; I'm always too something. Mom, I'm going to find someone eventually, on my own time. I don't want to rush into it."

"I know, Jake." Audrey said, patting his shoulder. "I'm just... I'm getting old. And I don't want to miss it once you do have children."

"Mom, you're gonna get more grandkids. I want to have kids as soon as I can, you know that. But I need to have a partner I can be sure will be there to help."

"Well," Audrey said, looking at him with eyes full of motherly love, "are you seeing anyone?"

"Um... not... maybe? I, uh, did meet this guy... I think there might be something between us... but it's too early to tell."

Josh smiled. Was Drake talking about him? Was he considering giving him a chance?

"Mom," Drake spoke again, pointing to the couch "Um... you'll never guess who is here..."

Audrey turned around and gasped as she saw Josh smiling nervously on the couch. "Josh..."

"Hi."

"Wha... not to be rude but... what are you doing here?" Audrey asked, confused. He was the last person she expected.

"Well... I gave a lecture and my venue just happened to be Penn State. Drake and I ran into each other and... we got to talking..."

""It's good to see you, Josh. Look at you, you're all grown up."

"Yeah." Josh said, standing. "But you haven't aged a bit."

"And still as polite as ever. I'm glad you boys are reconnecting."

"Yeah. I'm really glad I found him."

Audrey turned back to Drake and tapped him. "See, I told you he would come back for you."

"Mom!"

"Oh, don't be embarrassed, Jake." Megan laughed. "Everyone knows you were secretly hoping he'd come find you. Don't pretend you could have lived your whole life without him."

"Megan! Is everyone here to gang up on me or what?"

"Sorry." Audrey said. "It's just that... we haven't seen a smile on your face like that very often."

"It's ok..." Drake had to admit, his smile was pretty wide.

"Unka Jake!" Nate squealed, reaching out to him from Audrey's arms.

"What's up, little buddy?" Drake grabbed the little boy and spun him around before cuddling him close. "It's someone's special day today!" He rubbed his nose up against the little boy's, making him giggle.

"Yaaaay! Who dat?" Nate said, pointing curiously at Josh.

Josh suddenly felt awkward and out of place. Here was a big happy family standing in front of him. A family he used to be a part of. What was he doing there?

"That's Josh." Drake said, walking over to bring Nate closer.

_Oh, yeah,_ Josh thought as he watched Drake step toward him,_ that's why_.

"Hey there, little guy." Josh held out his hand and felt Nate's tiny fingers grab one of his.

"Big head!" Nate screamed joyfully.

Everyone laughed, including Josh. "Why is that always the first thing people say when they meet me?"

"Because it's true." Drake joked.

Josh nodded with a chuckle and finally felt like he fit in with the rest of them. Even if he wasn't part of their family anymore, he knew he belonged in Drake's life.


	11. A Backward Glance

**Chapter 11 - A Backward Glance (Posted 20 March 2011)**

After the party, Megan put Nate to bed and they all cleaned up. Everyone insisted that Josh was a guest and should just sit down, but he wouldn't hear it, he just kept cleaning.

"Well," Audrey began once the mess was gone, "I've got an early flight tomorrow so I should probably get back to my hotel."

"I still don't see why you rented a hotel room when you could have just stayed with us." Megan said.

"I wish you'd stay a little longer." Drake said a little sadly. "You barely come around here. And graduation isn't that far away, you're just going to have to fly out here again in a few days."

"I know... but California is my home, Jake. I don't belong in Pennsylvania. If anything, you should visit me. You haven't been back there since you left."

"Sorry..." Drake said.

"Sweetie, I love you. But you're all grown up now, you don't need your mommy around all the time. You have your own life here, taking care of Megan and Nate, and I have my own life back home. You'll always be my little boy, but you need your space from me. You'll know what I mean once Megan moves out."

Drake blinked. He never thought about that. He always knew that Megan would grow up and get her own place, but he never really realized how soon that was going to happen. And when it did, what would he have? An empty apartment and a Bachelor's degree. That's it. He really did feel like a parent to his little sister. He always had been the primary father figure in her life, except the few short years when Walter was in the picture.

Megan was like his daughter. And she was all grown up now. He'd fulfilled his responsibilities as her guardian and she didn't really need him anymore. And wherever she went, she'd take Nate with her, so he wouldn't have him, either.

He'd wanted his own children for a long time, but suddenly it felt like a need more than a want. He loved being a pseudo-father to Megan and even Nate to a degree. It was like he was born to be a dad. But, as much as he admired Megan for being a great single mom, he knew he couldn't do it alone. He'd only been Megan's guardian for four years, she was a young adult when they moved to Pennsylvania. And of course she was Nate's primary caregiver, he was just the supportive uncle. He wanted his own babies to raise, but he needed someone to help him. He needed a partner.

The only problem was he could never really even get a date. And the ones he did have ended up being weirdos or losers or they thought the same thing about him. Jake simply didn't have the mojo that Drake had.

"I think I'm already starting to find out what you mean, Mom." Drake frowned.

"Aw, Jake, don't be sad." Audrey hugged him. "It's hard when your kids don't need you anymore. But you've still got plenty of time to find the right guy and have as many kids as you want."

"I know. I just hope it happens soon."

"If it makes you feel better," Megan stepped in, "I won't be leaving until the end of the summer. And, if you want, you could come to Massachusetts with me for a while."

"Thanks, Megs." Drake smiled. But he knew he wanted to stay in Pennsylvania. Just as their mom's home was in California, his home was there. And he had to let Megan do her own thing no matter how far away she was.

"I'll see you guys again soon." Audrey said as she walked to the door. "And Josh, I hope I get to see you again as well."

"I'm sure you will." Josh said.

She waved goodbye as she left.

"So," Megan began, "what are you going to do now?"

"Josh is going to take me out to dinner." Drake said with a smirk.

"I am?"

"It's the least you can do after leaving me like you did." Drake tried to sound funny but he was being kind of serious.

"Alright." Josh smiled sadly.

"And I might be back late. We have a lot of talking to do."

"Fine. Just leave me here all alone." Megan said dramatically.

"Ok." Drake said happily and bounded out the door.

Josh followed after seeing Megan roll her eyes.

X

"Your mom really wants you to have kids." Josh said as they sat in a fancy restaurant.

"I know. She loves being a grandma. But she doesn't just want it for her, she wants me to be happy too." Drake thought out loud.

"So you're getting along? I know when I left... you seemed kind of mad at her. I was afraid you two might never make up."

"Oh. That." Drake stuttered. "We made up a few days after. I was... I was really bent out of shape and... well I mean Megan was the only one who even tried to talk to me for a while... because as popular as I thought I was, I didn't have any friends."

"You must be exaggerating." Josh insisted with a laugh.

But Drake wasn't laughing. "I'm not. After you left, no one seemed to care about me any more. Even Craig and Eric just stopped talking to me. I thought... well at that point I thought they were my friends, but of course they weren't. They were your friends. I was just some jerk they had to put up with because they were _your_ friends. With you gone, I had no one. And that hurt so much because it reminded me that that's how it was before I had you... no one was really my friend. I was just a playboy, so I didn't matter..."

"Jake... that can't really be true..."

"But it is. It's so true, I... I can still feel it, that aloneness." Drake looked down at the floor and squinted. He'd never told anyone this. And after keeping it locked inside for this long, it was that much harder to speak. "I mean, before I had you in my life... I never really noticed that I was all alone. And even when I did have you... and you brought so many people into my life... I never really connected it. But once you were gone... it was so easy to see I just wanted to kick myself for being so stupid. How could I never see that everyone hated me? But you... even though people made fun of you sometimes, me included, everyone loved you. So the people that were drawn to you were consequently drawn to me simply because we were always together. And once I realized that I was alone... I kind of figured I'd always be alone. Sure, I could try to make my own friends... but everyone there already knew me. So without you... I had no hope."

"No hope? Jake... there's always hope." Josh said seriously. "You have friends now, don't you?"

"No. I don't. I have a few people that talk to me once in a while. And the president of my class stalks me because he thinks I'm his lover from a past life or something... but no, I don't have any friends. I thought maybe becoming this new person, Jake, I could become someone people like, but I think I've just been fooling myself the whole time."

"Well... I'm back now. And as I said before, Jake and Drake aren't so different." Josh tried his best to console him.

"Yeah, they're both alone and going nowhere in life."

"Nowere? _Nowhere?_ Jake, how can you say that? You are about to graduate from Penn State with two degrees!"

"Yeah." Drake said with a little bite. "And then what? I don't have any kind of job lined up. I don't have a backup plan. I'm going to be stuck working as a grocer for the rest of my life."

"You work as a grocer?" Josh almost laughed.

"Yep. The guy who vowed to never work another day in his life has been bagging cat food and denture cream on the night shift for creepy old people for the past four years."

"And what's wrong with that?"

"What's wrong with it?" Drake reiterated. "I'm a freaking genius when I'm at school but then when I actually get out into the real world I can't do anything! I've messed up every single internship I've had, which is why I can't find a job with any reputable companies. Everyone knows Jake Parker can ace any test you put in front of him but when it comes to doing work he doesn't know shit. And that's why I work in a grocery store. That's why I'll _always_ work in a grocery store."

Josh stared at him. In the years they spent as brothers, he'd never seen Drake so angry. But he could tell it wasn't outward anger. It was inward anger. He blamed himself for everything. "What about your music?"

Drake shook his head. "My music is a waste of time."

"Don't say that..."

"Why not? It's true. It's not just me saying that, it's everyone who's heard it." Drake's voice suddenly became quiet. "You know I started out majoring in music. But my teachers heard the stuff I wrote and advised me to choose something else. And I didn't want to give it up completely, so I chose music production. And I know how tough that business is to get into, so I decided to double major in that and biology. But that turned out to be a bad decision for me as well."

"How is that a bad decision?"

"I just told you, I can't function in a professional setting. I'd be useless in a lab."

"But what about doing what I do? Lecturing at different schools and groups all over the world." Josh suggested. He knew Drake didn't have a fear of speaking to large crowds.

"I can't. Josh, you speak about the amazing scientific discoveries you've made. I haven't made any discoveries. I only know what's already there and I don't think I'd be able to find something new if it bit me on the ass."

"You have to be able to do something."

"Yes. I'm the best bagger in Pennsylvania."

"Oh, come on Drake!" Josh said, letting the name slip through his lips before he could correct himself. "Stop getting so down on yourself. You'll find something. And if worse comes to worst, you can come on the road with me."

Drake's head snapped up and he finally looked at Josh. "With you?"

"Yeah. Not as crew or anything, just as a friend. I'm not trying to toot my own horn here or anything, but I have more than enough money to support you for as long as you want."

"Josh... I don't know what to say..."

"Wait... I don't want you to answer yet. First I want to know... have you been thinking about... earlier?"

"Earlier? Oh... you mean... um... yeah, I've been thinking about it. I... I haven't stopped thinking about it..."

Josh smiled. He wasn't able to stop thinking about it either. "So..."

"I think um... we should discuss it... in private..."

Josh blushed. "Ok."

"But I don't want to do it at home. I don't want Megan to hear... not yet anyway."

"We could... we could go back to my hotel room." Josh blushed a little deeper. He sounded like he was hinting at much more than he was.

"That's perfect." Drake said.


	12. Back At The Hotel

**Chapter 12 - Back At The Hotel (Posted 29 March 2011)**

Josh took Drake back to his hotel room. They were both nervous. Josh wasn't sure what he was supposed to do or say. And Drake was just plain scared.

Bad thoughts just kept piling up in his head. _What if I mess up and he just leaves me again_?

When they were inside the room, Josh could see Drake's nervousness. He looked out of place, and appeared to be slightly shaking. So he did the only thing he could think of; he grabbed his hand and pulled him into a light hug.

"If you're uncomfortable..." Josh didn't want to do anything that would push Drake over the edge.

Drake gave a breathy sigh against Josh's chest. "No... no... I'm ok..."

"Are you cold? You're shivering."

"Sorry... I'm not cold, I just... I'm worried." Drake mumbled. "I can't believe you're back. It feels so weird... to have you touching me. But... it's not a bad feeling. It's the opposite, really, which is why this is so scary..."

"There's no reason to be scared, Jake." Josh promised him. "Anything we do isn't wrong."

"It should be, though." Drake said, despite his tightening hold on Josh. "We were brothers for years."

"But we're not related. We were just really close friends. We shared a room. We were inseparable. Like you said, we even touched each other all the time. We even kissed. Did any of that ever feel wrong?"

"No..."

"So why should it feel wrong now?"

"I don't know. I... you're probably right. But I think... It's been _so_ long, Josh. It's been so long since I've really been with anyone. And I'm afraid of being hurt again." Drake felt himself start to cry against Josh. "You just... you came into my life and then you just... you just left! You just left and I never saw you again! And I felt like that's what I deserved, Josh. I..."

"Jake..." Josh couldn't take it anymore. Seeing Drake like this was maddening. Drake was supposed to be the confident one. He was supposed to be the strong one when someone else crumbled. Not the other way around. But suddenly it was all backward. "How many times must I tell you that I'm sorry? My biggest regret is not talking to you."

Drake sniffed, but the tears and snot didn't stop running down his face. He just sobbed into Josh's chest, drenching his shirt. "Josh... I love you."

"I know. I'm so sorry. I didn't ever mean to abandon you, Jake. I just felt so... confused. I tried looking for you. I swear, if I could go back and make sure we kept in touch I would! In a heartbeat!"

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to make you feel guilty. I just wanted to... to tell you that this is really hard for me. It's hard to see you again. I want... I want... you. I need you, Josh, but... but what if you just end up going away again? I've already been through that once. And look at me. I'm a mess. I can't do it again."

"You won't have to do it again, I swear. Jake, I never want to let you go ag-..."

Josh was interrupted by a pair of lips pressing roughly against his. Drake was kissing him again. His lips were so soft and sweet, but they moved with such a fury, Josh was hardly able to keep up.

"Promise?" Drake asked into the kiss.

"I promise. Even... even if this doesn't work out... I'll always love you. I'll always be here for you."

"Good. I need you." Drake pawed at the back of Josh's neck.

"I need you too, Jake."

"_Drake_." Drake whispered.

"What?"

"It's Drake. _You_ can call me Drake."

"But... you said..." Josh was already lightheaded, so this only added to his confusion.

"I know what I said. But... it's too strange to have you call me Jake. Besides, Drake and Josh sounds much better than Jake and Josh, doesn't it?"

"Well, yeah... but, are you sure? I mean... all that stuff you said about leaving your old self behind..."

"Doesn't mean anything now." Drake said, kissing his jaw. "I changed because you left. Now that I have you, I can be Drake again."

"I thought you said you were scared?"

"Jake was scared. Drake takes risks. Especially for you, Josh."

"Do you have some kind of multiple personality disorder or something?" Josh tried to joke, but began to consider the possibility.

Drake giggled darkly. "I'm being serious, Josh. We already know we love each other. Why shouldn't we give this a chance?"

"So... it's really ok?"

"I'm still not sure. But I can't let this opportunity slip away."

"Wanna go to the bed?"

"You move fast." Drake pulled Josh over toward the large hotel bed.

"I missed you." Josh said as if that explained it all.

"I missed you too." Drake replied as he was pushed down onto the firm mattress.

"You really wanna do this?"

"Do _you_?"

"Absolutely." Josh's voice was saturated with need.

"There's your answer, then."


	13. The Return

**Chapter 13 - The Return (Posted 3 April 2011)**

The next morning, Drake woke up feeling more whole than he had in a long time. Somewhere throughout the night, the feeling that being intimate with Josh was wrong had dissolved and he'd let himself enjoy the experience. And boy did he enjoy it!

When he reached out and realized he was the only one in bed, his heard sank a little. Would Josh really just leave him there like that after _promising_ never to leave him again?

But then the door opened up and in walked Josh with a tray full of food.

"Aw you're awake." Josh pouted cutely. "I was hoping you wouldn't wake up until I got back, I didn't want you to think I just left you here. I brought breakfast."

"Breakfast?"

Josh laughed and set the tray on the bed. "Yeah, it's a meal that most people eat in the morning."

"I know that." Drake said lightly. "But... no one's ever brought me breakfast before... half the time they don't even stick around that long..."

Josh sighed as he climbed back in the bed and wrapped an arm securely around Drake's shoulders. "Well I'm not just anyone. And you're not just anyone either, you know."

"It sure does seem like that when I'm with you..."

"So have you made up your mind yet?" Josh asked suddenly. "About coming traveling with me?"

"I don't know, Josh..." Drake looked down. "I... I want to. But..."

"Look," Josh proposed, "I'm going to be in town for a few more days because I have another lecture and a conference. If you decide anytime between now and when I leave that you'd like to come along, let me know. Of course, even if you would decide to come after then, the offer will still be open but it might be a while until I can come back for you."

"I'll think about it."

"That's all I ask."

X

"Welcome back." Megan said as Drake walked in the door of their apartment.

"Uh... hi." Drake answered awkwardly before walking over to the cupboard and pulling out a glass.

"Did you have fun reconnecting with Josh?"

"Yeah, it was great." Drake smiled. He went to the fridge and poured himself some soda and began to guzzle it.

"Did he use protection?"

Drake spit his soda out with wide eyes and dropped the glass. The glass shattered everywhere. Megan just laughed.

"Megan!"

"What? It's a legitimate question. I saw the way he was looking at you when he was here."

"No it... but... and he... how did you... why would... _what_?"

"Jeez, Jake, calm down, it's not like I'm asking you for the dirty details!"

"What makes you think there even are any 'dirty details,' huh?"

"Hmm, let's see." Megan made an inquisitive face. "You two were obviously in love back when Mom and Walter were together, but were either too stupid to notice or too scared to admit it. He runs out of your life, leaving you shattered and heartbroken. Then he suddenly reappears after you already know you're gay _and_ you realized you were so afraid of living without him you_ changed your identity_. And now you expect me to believe you didn't just get back from having wild and crazy sex with him?"

"What happened to my sweet, innocent little sister?" Drake asked, mortified.

"She got knocked up by a sleaze ball and reads yaoi manga late at night after a hard day of studying and caring for her child. I grew up, Jake, and it's about time you did too. You and Josh are a unit."

"Huuuh." Drake sighed. "I guess there's no use trying to hide it if you already know."

"Exactly."

"So... you don't think it's... weird?"

"I stopped noticing your weirdness years before Josh even entered the picture."

"That's not what I meant."

"Jake... all I mean is it isn't weird because everyone knows you two can't live without each other."

"He seems to be doing alright without me."

"That's not true. He's been looking for you all these years, wherever he went."

"I know. But is this really... the right thing to do? Is it ok for us to be together like this? We were brothers! We..."

"Just consider how you really feel about him." Megan looked right in his eyes, telling him that she fiercely believed in what she was about to say. "You love him. I know you do. And maybe you never really realized what kind of love it is. Maybe you did and just didn't accept it, I don't know. But the point is you two love each other and you want to be together. It's only natural that things would develop this way."

"I know, I know. It's just weird for me. That whole time I saw him as my brother, and now I'm looking at him like... like... like he's a lost lover or something."

"I'm not asking this to be gross, but did you sleep with him?"

"Yes."

"Was it nice?"

"It was very nice."

"Then what's the problem?"

"The problem is I'm afraid!"

"Well, then stop being afraid! Live a little!"

"But what if it doesn't work out?"

"Then it doesn't work out. But you'll never know until you give it a shot. And... this is just female intuition speaking, but I don't think failure is anything you have to worry about this time, Jake. I think you've got a good chance at finding real happiness here. I'm your sister, no one likes messing with you more than me, but there's also no one who wants to see you happy as much as I do. Trust me?"

Drake just looked at her. How could she be so sure that this would work out for him? "Ok. I'll give it a shot."

"Good."

"And... I guess I should tell you..."

"You want us to start calling you 'Drake' again?"

"How did you..."

"I always knew that if anyone could bring Drake back, it would be Josh."

"You're an awesome sister, you know that?"

She shrugged. "I am pretty great, aren't I?"


	14. To Travel Or Not To Travel

**Chapter 14 - To Travel Or Not To Travel (Posted 26 April 2011)**

**A/N: I feel like this story isn't going anywhere... But next chapter there will be some drama. Sort of major drama, so watch out xD**

"So..." Drake said to his sister. "Now what do I do?"

"Nothing." She said happily.

"Nothing?"

"Nothing."

"I can't just do nothing, Megan." Drake crossed his arms. "I have to do something! I have to... talk to him or... something. Anything, as long as it's not nothing."

"Drake, five minutes. Just sit here and do _nothing_ for five minutes."

"Why?"

"Because, you deserve it. You're always working or studying or both. And now you've just made a decision that could impact the rest of your life. You need to relax, and do nothing. Let it soak in."

"That would be doing something."

"No, it would be letting things alone."

"Which is doing something." Drake was just trying to rile her now.

"Oh, just come sit with me. Nate is asleep, so we can do nothing together."

Drake sighed silently and plopped down next to Megan on the sofa. They sat in silence for a few seconds, until Drake broke it. "What should I say to him?"

"Be quiet, Drake." Megan shushed him.

"But I don't know what I..."

"Drake! Just be quiet. For five minutes. You'll figure it out."

Five minutes. He could do that. He could use the time to think. _Think? Think about what? I have so much to think about. I have the speech I have to give at graduation. I have to think about my new hours at the grocery store for the summer. I have to think about Megan going away to Harvard. I have to think about how much I'll miss her and Nate. I have to think about Mom and when she'll visit again. I have to think about... Josh. Josh Nichols. My... ex brother? New... lover? Mon amour. That sounds better. Why does it always sound better in a foreign language? Maybe because I know English, and I know Josh was my brother. In English. I don't know how to say that in French, so it doesn't exist. In French. It exists in Spanish, though. Mi hermano, mi amor. Yeah, that's just as bad as English. But... he's not my brother anymore. He hasn't been for a very long time. And we were never related by blood. Le sang... pas de sang. La sangre... sin sangre. No blood. That makes it better, right? And... I do love him. So, if he's not my brother, and I slept with him... where does that leave us? Not brotherly love. Not friendly love. Actual love? I guess I can see that. No, I can really see it. Of course. I could smack myself! I love him. I love Josh. Josh loves me? Well sure he does. He always has. So what happens now? Do I tell him? Do I just say 'I love you' and be done with it? No... what happens after that? Some more sex? Ok, no complaint there. But then what? We just... love each other and have sex? That can't be it. What do people do when they love each other? They live together, right? Or they at least do things together, like go out to eat and see movies and go shopping and take walks and get a pet. Wow. I want to do all that with Josh. And more. But how do we get to that point? Oh, yeah. Duh. Tengo que ir con él. _ "I have to go with him."

"There it is." Megan said wittingly.

"There what is?" Drake asked.

"The answer you were looking for."

"How did you..."

"Don't doubt my intuition, Drake." Megan smiled at him. "He asked you to leave with him, didn't he?" she asked as if she already knew.

"Yes..."

"Of course he did. And you didn't know what to say because you're afraid. But you've been so worried about finding a job and finding someone to settle down with and having a family... and now your afraid when you find the perfect opportunity to have everything you want. You should go with him, Drake. He'll take care of you and you can adopt a whole horde of kids and you'll make each other happy."

"I'd like that..." Drake chuckled.

"Of course you would. You've had fun going to school and you're very smart, but would you actually want to work in some boring lab for the rest of your life?"

"No."

"Do you want to be a professor?"

"God, no."

"Then go with him. Pick up your music again and start having fun and being the take-things-as-they-are kind of guy you used to be. You once said you'd never give up on your music, whether it took you anywhere or not. What happened to that?"

"I couldn't do that and school at the same time... I had to give one up and... I chose school. I thought it was the mature thing to do."

"As much as I hate to say this," Megan rolled her eyes at herself, "I'm glad you've become a responsible adult, Drake. But the great thing about you is your immaturity. I miss that. If anyone can find a compromise between work and play, it's you. Especially now that you're trying to bring the real Drake Parker back."

"I don't know..."

"I bet you'd have a lot of time to write your music on the road, you know. And I'm sure Josh would be totally supportive of you."

"I'm sure he would too."

"So call him."

"I... don't know his number."

"What?"

"He never gave me his number. I guess. things just happened so fast, it got overlooked."

"Tell me he has yours..."

"Nope."

"Great. You two may be all grown up, but you're still a pair of idiots when you're together."

Drake just smiled broadly at her comment. "It is kind of great. That means he'll have to come get me."

"Or you could go to his hotel."

"Nah, I'll just wait for him to come here. It'll probably be soon anyway, I wouldn't want to get to his hotel only to find out he's already here."

"And what if he has the same thought?"

"He'll realize I want him to come to me."

"I'm sure he will." Megan stood. "I'm going for a walk."

"Ok."

"If Nate wakes up, give him a snack. Grapes or a banana or something. No cookies."

"Ok, no cookies." Drake said dramatically.

Megan sighed. "Fine, he can have one, _only_ one. Please?"

"Yay!" Drake did a little dance in his seat.

"And if Josh stops by while I'm out, tell him I said thanks."

"Thanks for what?"

"For following you, obviously."


	15. Feelings

**Chapter 15 - Feelings (Posted 1 June 2011)**

**A/N: I'm back from my break :D I'm a high school graduate and I'm going to college in the fall! Isn't it amazing how things just seem to work themselves out sometimes? I also wanted to tell you all that I recently got a facebook account, so if you'd like to add me there is a link in my profile. Once I have enough friends I'm going to start doing some cool things with my stories so please check it out! Anyway, here is the long overdue chapter 15!**

Drake was sitting on the sofa waiting for either Megan to return or Josh to barge in looking for him. He turned on the television and sat back as he watched the news.

A few minutes later, there was a hurried knock at the door. "Who is it?" Drake yelled, intent on watching the weather forecast.

"It's me." Josh's voice came through loudly.

Drake jumped up and pulled the door open at lightning speed. "Josh..."

"Did you miss me?" Josh asked with a cocky grin.

Drake responded by grabbing Josh by the collar and pulling him into the apartment. He closed the door and slammed Josh's back up against it. Covering Josh's lips with his own, he pressed their bodies together tightly and moaned deeply into the kiss. He felt Josh respond just as passionately, moving his lips fervently and wrapping his arms securely around Drake's waist. "I sure did." Drake said breathily as he gazed into Josh's eyes.

"I... um... I didn't want to bother you. But silly me, I forgot to get your phone number, so I..."

"I love you." Drake blurted, unable to hold it in anymore. "I know I told you already but I feel like if I don't spell out exactly how I feel then this will all have been for nothing. Josh, I've always loved you as my best friend. And I know it's weird but I still even feel a little bit of that brotherly love for you. But the biggest thing that I just have to make sure you understand is that I'm in love with you. I don't care that we've been apart for so long and I don't care that I'm scared because I know that no matter what I can always count on you as long as you know just how much love I have for you." Drake felt his skin start to heat up. He wasn't ashamed of his words, but explaining it so bluntly left him feeling exposed and vulnerable. He trusted that Josh wasn't going to take advantage of his weakened state, but there was still that fear living deep within him, chewing away at his insides like an undetectable cancer.

"Drake..." Josh said, stunned.

Drake closed his eyes and hung his head. "I'm sorry... that was..." Just as Drake was about to apologize profusely for saying all those things, he felt Josh's arms tighten around him. A gentle kiss was placed on his lips and he sighed, unable to protest.

"Drake, don't ever be sorry for sharing your feelings. I'm really happy you told me all of that." Josh said as he brushed the hair out of Drake's face.

"Really?"

"Absolutely. I actually wanted to talk to you about... what last night meant for us..."

"Josh last night meant the world to me!" Drake cried against his chest. "I meant to tell you then... but I've been so... emotional since I saw you at my lecture and I was just so confused and..."

"It's ok, Drake." Josh comforted him.

"I just... I love you so much."

"I love you too."

"And I want to come with you."

"You what...?" The smile on Josh's face was enough to melt Drake's heart.

"I want to go on the road with you. I belong with you and I don't ever want to be apart from you again. I don't just want you in my life, I want you to _be_ my life... That is, if you want me there..."

"Are you deaf or something?" Josh joked. "I told you the offer would always be open. Of course I want you."

"Josh..." Drake was amazed.

"Come on, let's go sit down." Josh tugged him toward the couch. "Are you happy, Drake?"

"Now that I have you, I am."

"Good, because I..."

"_A young woman was injured by a moving vehicle near Gold Star Apartments just a few moments ago..."_ a news anchor announced from the television, catching Drake's attention.

"That's my apartment building..." Drake said.

"_She was taken by helicopter to the emergency room at Hershey Med Center. The police are not yet releasing the girl's name and are still trying to contact her family."_

As if on cue, Drake's phone rang. The blood drained from his face as he leapt out of his seat and scrambled to pick up the phone.

"Hello!" he answered nervously.

"Jake Parker?" the voice on the other end inquired.

"That's me..."

"This is Dr. Ehicks from the Hershey Medical Center."

"Oh no..." Drake knew what was coming.

"We recently received an emergency patient and you were listed as her only contact..."

"Megan." Drake choked.

"That would be correct. She's being prepped for surgery as we speak. If you could come up here we'd be happy to inform you fully of her condition."

"I'll be there as soon as possible. Thanks." Drake hung up the phone before waiting for a reply.

"Drake, what's going on?" Josh stood, sensing the Drake's panic.

"Megan... the girl that got hit outside my apartment, it's Megan..." Drake began to sob violently.

"Oh my god..."

"I have to go. I know we were in the middle of..."

"Don't even worry about it. We should get going right away. Hershey Med Center is pretty far from here."

"We?" Drake asked sheepishly.

"Yes, we. She's your sister but I care about her too. Plus you're in no state to be driving. I'll take you. Come on."

"Josh... what am I going to do..."

"Just calm down." Josh said sweetly, placing a hand on Drake's head. "I know you're worried about her but now isn't the time to lose your cool. You have to be strong for her, Drake. Now come on, I'll drive you to Hershey and you can call Audrey on the way."

"Ok..."

"Everything is going to be fine, Drake." Josh kissed his forehead. "Just take deep breaths and let me handle everything else."


	16. Hospital Scenes

**A/N: Happy Wednesday! Yay! Chapter 16! Although I'm not so happy some of you are going to be with the next chapter. I can't believe you guessed it already :'( Please don't hate me? And add me on facebook! I would like to have all of you as friends so you can get updates and maybe some special surprises :D**

**Chapter 16 - Hospital Scenes (Posted 8 June 2011)**

"What do you mean we can't see her!" Drake demanded through tears.

"I'm very sorry sir," a nurse tried to explain to him, "but she's in recovery right now. No one is allowed to see her until the doctor says so."

"But... she's my sister..." Drake protested. "And we came all the way here..."

"Drake," Josh grabbed his shoulder, "we can wait, ok? I'm sure the doctor is just making sure she can handle company. We'll wait here until they say we can see her."

Drake looked up at him, seeking comfort and reassurance. He saw so much more than that shining in Josh's big eyes. He had no choice but to agree. "Alright."

"Thanks for catching us up." Josh told the nurse.

She nodded and smiled sadly at them and then walked away.

Josh grabbed Drake's hands and pulled him over to the waiting area. They sat on a hard sofa. There were only a few other people there. An older man and woman. A middle-aged woman and three younger children. And a somewhat miffed looking teenaged boy.

When they sat down, Josh wrapped his arms around Drake and hugged him close. Drake didn't protest, leaning against Josh's soft body and placing his head on Josh's warm chest.

"I'm so scared, Josh." Drake squeaked softly, burying his face in Josh's shirt.

"I know." Josh kissed the top of his head. "I'm scared too. For both of you. And your mom. She sounded so devastated on the phone."

"Yeah. She can't get a flight back out here until the one she already has booked. She wanted to drive here but it's way too far..."

"She knows that, Drake. She's just frantic. Her daughter's in the hospital and she can't be here with her. I would be horrified too..."

"I'm glad you're here."

"I wouldn't be anywhere else." Josh said, running his fingers through Drake's hair in an attempt to relax him.

"I love you." Drake clung to him, not really caring if anyone was watching his odd behavior.

"You know I love you too."

"Do you really, though?"

"Of course," Josh assured him.

"You promise?"

"I promise, Drake." Josh was beginning to sound worried.

"I almost died..." Drake whispered.

"What?" Josh asked softly.

"After you moved out." Drake's voice was barely audible. "I was so... heartbroken, Josh. And I wasn't watching where I was going. I didn't do it on purpose... the truck just came out of nowhere and the next thing I knew... I was here. Well, not _here_, this was back in California... but I was in the hospital. And... I was practically dead. They were... they were ready to give up on me..."

"Drake..." Josh was shaking. From fear or sadness, he wasn't quite sure.

"I almost died. I didn't want to... but it just seemed so easy. It seemed so easy to just stop fighting..." Drake sniffed but didn't lift his head from Josh's chest. "I didn't _want_ it. But I didn't mind it either."

Josh felt his heart breaking all over again. Was Drake really that desperate? Had he been so devoid of hope that he had no reason to keep living? "Drake... why didn't you tell me?"

"It's not something you just tell someone, Josh. I didn't ever want to tell you. It was such a low point in my life. But you got me through it."

"I... what?" _I did? I wasn't even there..._

"When I was... unconscious, I kept seeing your face. And I kept remembering all the times you encouraged me, and told me never to give up. And I tried to ignore it, because I thought you didn't care about me anymore. I wondered why you would be the one my subconscious decided to draw my strength from. But before I knew it I was waking up. The doctors were stunned. They'd been just about to... to... they were in the middle of trying to convince my mom to pull the plug when I opened my eyes."

"That's... that's so..."

Drake hadn't even heard Josh speak. "The doctors asked me how I was able to wake up. They wanted to know what happened to me while I was under. I lied and told them I couldn't remember."

"Why?"

"I didn't want them to know. I wanted everyone to think I'd done it on my own. _I_ wanted to think I'd done it on my own. And I've been pretending... I've been telling myself that I could live without you but I can't..."

"It's ok." Josh petted him. "You don't have to. Never again, Drake. I won't ever leave you again."

"Never?"

"Never."

"Thank you. I'm just so worried. Megan... the same thing is happening to her. I know it."

"You don't know that." Josh tried to argue.

"I do. She wouldn't need this much of a recovery period. It's been hours. She's dying, Josh. My sister is dying and I'm not allowed to be there with her to tell her to keep fighting!"

"Drake, Megan is a strong girl. I know she's gonna give it all she's got. She's gonna pull through this. Just wait and see. No one can defeat Megan Parker, remember?"

Drake chuckled and looked up at Josh. "Yeah. That girl is unstoppable."

"There you go." Josh pecked him on the lips before cuddling with him again. They didn't notice the other people watching them out of the corners of their eyes. Not that they would have cared. All that mattered now was Megan. They knew she was going to make it. They just knew it.


	17. She's Fighting

**A/N: So some of you guessed what I had planned. And I was kinda bummed about that. So I've decided to scrap some parts of this story and take it in a new direction! I hope you like it... :D Oh, and this update is kinda short, but that's just because I wanted to have it separate from what comes next and I couldn't think of more to add... forgive me?**

**Chapter 17 - She's Fighting (Posted 15 June 2011)**

"It's a good thing we asked Mrs. Pepperidge look after Nate before we left." Drake commented. It was dark outside and they'd been waiting for hours for any news on Megan's condition.

"Yeah." Josh agreed. "It was really nice of her to take him on such short notice."

"Josh, I..."

As Drake began to talk, a beeping noise came from Josh's coat pocket. "Hold on just one second." Josh begged. "It's my manager, it must be important for him to call me on my personal cell and not my business one..."

"Go ahead."

"Thanks." Josh nodded sadly and opened the phone. "Hello? Not flying? Well... no I don't want an earlier flight. I don't care, we'll just have to reschedule the lecture. Well then cancel it, I'm not getting on an earlier flight. No, _you're_ going to call them, you're the manager. Then refund it. That's not my policy and you know it, refund it all. It's none of your business where I am. It's personal. Do you want me to fire you? I can manage myself, you know. Experience? I managed a band and you think I don't have the experience? When you applied for the job as my manager you had no idea what you were doing! That's more like it. Call them and explain that the flight was cancelled and I couldn't leave any earlier. Yes, all of it. Good. Goodbye." Josh snapped the phone shut and shook his head. "That guy is a mess."

"Your manager?" Drake guessed.

"Yes. I didn't really _need_ one, but I thought it might be nice if someone else could take some of the work, you know? But it's almost more work to make sure he's doing everything right."

"Why don't you fire him?"

"I'm going to." Josh admitted. "But I want to wait until we're back around his hometown and see if I can set him up with another job right away. He's not a bad guy, just a bad manager."

"I see." Drake said. He'd stopped crying a little while ago. Mostly because he was too tired to keep going.

"Drake?" Josh asked quietly.

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you too." Drake smiled a little.

"And Megan loves you. And I'm sure she's fighting as hard as she can. She has people that she knows care about her. She has you and Audrey and of course Nate. She knows you're all worried about her and I'm positive that she's going to wake up any second."

"Mr. Parker?"

Drake and Josh looked behind them and saw a tall man in a white jacket.

"Are you the Doctor that's treating my sister?" Drake stood quickly and asked.

"I am. My name is Dr. Peterman." the Doctor said. "And you are?" he looked at Josh.

"I'm..." Josh started.

"He's family." Drake said. "Just please tell us what's happening with Megan.

"Well... the surgery went fairly well. We were able to get her breathing on her own and she's been stable for about half an hour now."

"So we can see her?" Drake asked hopefully.

"Um, yes, you may see her but...it may be hard to look at her..."

"Why?" Josh asked. "Is she..."

"She's not disfigured or anything." the Doctor assured them. "Most of the injuries were actually quite minor and may leave some faint scarring, but she was hit from behind so the major injuries we were able to stitch up and won't be noticeable."

"So what's wrong with her?" Drake asked.

"Mr. Parker... you're sister is comatose."


	18. Don't Give Up On Her

**A/N: I'm so sorry for not updating on Wednesday! I had food poisoning and then I was at an overnight orientation (it was fun, but I was sick, so it kinda sucked too lol) so I'm posting this to make up for it since I don't want to be behind schedule. Chapter 18 will be up on Wednesday :D**

**Chapter 18 - Don't Give Up On Her (Posted 27 June 2011)**

Josh just stared at Drake's rigid body. He looked pale and lifeless as he stood in front of the doctor. "Drake?"

Drake didn't move. He didn't say anything. He didn't blink. And Josh was almost sure he wasn't even breathing.

"Mr. Parker?" the Doctor asked worriedly.

"He's just shocked, Dr. Peterman."

"I understand. This kind of news can be devastating to siblings, especially when they are so close. We're doing everything we can to wake her up safely. There are some things we'd like to try, but Miss Parker left her brother in charge in the event that she was unable to make her own decisions. So we can't really try anything until he gives us permission."

"Ok." Josh said. "I'm going to take him home and see if I can get him to snap out of it."

"You don't want to see her?"

"It's not that we don't want to see her, it's just that I'm fairly certain that Drake wouldn't be able to handle it. We'll come back tomorrow so you can give us the full overview."

"Alright. Well, the insurance forms were accepted, so she can stay as long as she needs. I'll see you both tomorrow." the doctor said sullenly and walked away.

Josh tried to gently shake Drake out of his shocked stance, but he didn't budge. "Drake."

Finally, Drake looked over at Josh.

"Drake, come one. I'm gonna take you home."

"But... Megan..." Drake said in a small voice.

Josh wrapped a comforting arm around his shoulders. "You need to clear your head. You're stressed and I think you just need to rest a little bit before you see her."

"But she's..."

"She's going to be fine." Josh hugged him. "We'll come back tomorrow after you've had time to process this and then we'll find out exactly what's going on. The doctor said she'll be fine."

"Ok..."

"Come on." Josh led him out of the hospital and helped him into the car. The drive back to Drake's apartment was silent. When they got back, Josh walked him to the door and helped him inside. "Drake?" Josh asked once the silence had become unbearable. "Are you gonna be ok?"

"I don't know."

"Would you like me to stay?"

Drake nodded. "Please."

"Alright. I'm going to go get Nate and then I'll be right back."

Drake just nodded again and watched as Josh hurried to retrieve the little boy. Josh returned a few minutes later, Nathaniel in tow, to find Drake standing and staring in the same spot he'd left him. Josh took it upon himself to find the boy's room and put him to bed before going back out to Drake.

He put his arms loosely around his midsection. "Drake. You've gotta snap out of it. You're scaring me a little."

"Sorry." Drake mumbled into Josh's chest.

"You don't have to be sorry. I'm just worried about you." Josh tightened his hold on Drake.

"I know. I'm just so scared for her. The doctors are going to treat her like she's already dead, I know it. As soon as we go there tomorrow, they're going to be trying to convince us that it would be better to let her go. But I'm not going to let that happen."

"They can't do anything without your consent, Drake." he assured him. "As long as you keep insisting that they keep her alive, they have to do everything they can."

"I know. I just wish there was more that I could do. I _know_ what she's going through. I may not know what she's thinking or dreaming about, but I know what she's feeling. She's weighing the pros and cons of fighting and trying to determine how hard she'll have to fight to make it out."

"She's your sister, Drake, she _will_ pull through. You saw my face when you were in her position, she's going to see Nate's. And yours and Audrey's. She knows you guys are all calling out to her and I know that even if she thinks it would be easier to give up, she won't just leave you guys behind."

"Yeah..."

"Drake. Trust me. She's going to make it. Now why don't you try and get some sleep?"

"Ok..." Drake said sadly as he began to walk toward his bedroom. "You're coming with me, right? I really don't want to be alone right now..."

"Of course I'll come with you."

"Thank you."

"There's no need to thank me, Drake." Josh said with a small smile. "I'd do anything for you."


	19. Neurotherapy

**A/N: I never seem to be able to make my deadlines, do I? Really, I need to start keeping track of time, it's past 1 am here! Next week, I will be on time fer sure, scout's honor. And a note... neurotherapy is just word I made up... I have no clue if it is real or what it is or anything so just consider it medibabble for the sake of this story haha :D**

**Chapter 19 - Neurotherapy (Posted 30 June 2011)**

"Don't you _dare_!" Drake was furious. He'd had a relatively calm night, with Josh doing the best he could to soothe him. And a slow morning as they made the drive all the way back the the Medical Center. And now he was just plain angry. "Don't even think about it, not even for a _second_. She's not going anywhere."

The doctors as well as much of the other staff had spent the past few hours telling him that it would be best to transfer her to a local hospital. But regular hospitals didn't have the technology they had, so her chances of survival would be cut in half.

"But, sir," a nurse tried to calm him by placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Don't touch me. And don't lay a finger on my sister unless it's to bring her out of this fucking coma."

"Mr. Parker," another nurse said, "the transfer doctor finally arrived. He just looked over your sister's charts and would like to speak with you. Alone." She eyed all the other medical professionals who were gathered round Megan's bed. They all rolled their eyes and filed out. "Alone as in just Mr. Parker." she glared at Josh, who hadn't moved.

Josh nodded apologetically and made to leave, but Drake held his arm out, barring him from exiting. "He stays."

She sighed heavily and left without further comment.

The two boys stood there, waiting for the doctor to enter. "They say people in comas look like they're sleeping." Drake said. "But that's not true at all. They just say that because they're all afraid to admit what they really look like."

"Don't say it..." Josh pleaded with him.

Drake looked at Josh and saw the pain in his eyes. It wasn't his fault Megan was here and it wasn't his fault everyone was so willing to let her slip away, and yet Drake had been taking it out on him all morning. "Ok. You're right. I'm sorry." He looked back down on Megan. It really didn't look like she was merely asleep. It looked like she was... he couldn't even bring himself to think it now even though he'd been about to say it aloud just seconds ago. "I just can't believe no one has faith in her. If _I_ can wake up from a stupid coma, Megan should be able to jump right up like nothing even happened."

"She will, Drake. You just have to give her some time."

"I just feel so useless. All this research I've done and I can't figure a way to save my own sister?"

"Don't blame yourself. That'll do more harm that good."

"I know." Drake hung his head in defeat.

That's when the door swung open and revealed a tall man in a white smock. "One of you is Mr. Parker?" the man had a deep voice and a southern accent.

"That's me." Drake raised his hand slightly. "You can call me Drake."

"Drake, my boy, I am so sorry about your sister." the doctor got right to the point. "My name is Dr. Borde, I'm a traveling doctor, but my homestead is in Louisiana. I specialize in coma patients and I was in the area so as soon as I was informed of your situation, I came right in."

"Thank you."

"It's no trouble. I was looking over your family's medical history and notice you'd suffered a similar affliction a few years ago."

"That's right."

"It said you just mysteriously woke up, unaware of what brought you out."

"That's..."

"A lie, am I correct?" Dr. Borde had a knowing smirk.

Why deny it? "Yes."

"I figured. Many times, people experience strange out-of-body experiences, or they have a vision in their subconscious mind that allows their conscious mind to become more active."

"Ok..." Drake wondered what this had to do with getting Megan to wake up.

"I'm not going to ask you what you dreamed of when you were comatose, it's not my business to know. But I believe that anyone can brought out of a coma with the right amount of... coaxing."

"Coaxing?" Now Josh was curious.

"Precisely. You see, sometimes the conscious and unconscious mind can communicate with each other if the message is strong enough. That is often why people with large, caring families or lots of supportive friends come out of sickness faster than someone without that. Now I know for a fact that this hospital's equipment can keep your sister alive for an extremely long time, perhaps indefinitely as technology progresses, but it will take a lot of time and hard work to wake her."

"I'll do anything."

"I had a feeling you'd say that." The doctor nodded understandingly. "The way I see it, you have three options to save her. Option one, keep her on life support and leave her as a vegetable for the rest of her life. But this option seems cold since I sense that Megan has more than enough potential to pull through this with your help."

"I won't do that, I'll never stop trying to wake her up." Drake said forcefully.

"Quite. Option two, there is an experimental neurotherapy which has a 50/50 chance of waking her up. However, the procedure is experimental, and failure is always the result of shocking the brain to overexposure of certain chemicals, and almost always results in death. Many people have recently decided to try the treatment, and 60 percent have been successful. Only one person has lived through a failure."

"That's too risky..."

"That's where option three comes in. I've developed a chemical-free therapy treatment of my own. There's no surgery or anything involved, it's all psychological. I've only tried it a few times, but it's never hurt anyone. The worst that happens is they don't wake up as soon as I predicted." the doctor did his best to not sound full of himself. "And then, of course there's the unspoken and taboo option four. Pulling the plug."

"I won't pull the plug. As long as she's alive, I won't give up hope. I want to try your treatment. Please."

"Splendid. There's just one small thing. While promising never to pull the plug, many families don't realize that insurance only covers it for a certain amount of time. Now my treatment is free as I do this as a volunteer, but unfortunately I cannot guarantee her life support since that is handled through the hospital."

"Insurance?" Drake's face went pale. Their insurance was not very good. In fact, now that he thought about it, he wondered if they would even cover her surgery. "My insurance is... not great. And I don't make a lot of money... I'm a bagger at a grocery store..." Drake was on the edge of a breakdown before he felt Josh's arms encircle him from behind.

"I'll handle it, Drake."

"What?"

"I told you I'd do anything for you. And I care about Megan a lot as well, so don't think for one second that I'd let anyone pull the plug on her."

"Josh..." Drake felt tears brimming, but blinked them away.

"Ah, young love." the doctor sighed contently. "What I wouldn't give to be young again..."

"It's settled then." Drake said, feeling more hope than ever now that he had all the facts. "Megan will stay on life support, and you will treat her. And we'll do whatever we can to help."


	20. Nate

**A/N: I'm on time! Are you surprised? Also, my portrayal of children isn't that good, since I'm not around them that much. I'm not sure if Nate is going to seem older or younger than he is, but just go with it lol. And thank you for all your support and reviews etc!**

**Chapter 20 - Nate (Posted 6 July 2011)**

"I'm not sure about this." Drake said. It was still early in the morning, just a few days after meeting Dr. Borde.

"The doctor said it might help if we bring Nate in." Josh said sympathetically. He'd canceled the remainder of his lectures, deciding not to go back on tour until Megan woke.

"I don't like the idea of him seeing her like that. Especially since he's so young. Even at my age, if I had to look at my mother..." Drake looked away, but not before Josh caught sight of the tear in his eye.

"Drake." Josh hugged him, pinning Drake's arms at his side. "He's starting to ask questions. We can't keep telling him she's coming home soon. We have to tell him she won't be back for a while."

"I know but... he's just a child. He shouldn't have to deal with anything like this." Since Megan was unable to care for Nate, Drake had been appointed his temporary guardian.

"You're right. But the fact is that it's happening. And he wants to see his mommy. And I'm sure bringing him in will help her. It might be what we need to get through to her. So she knows we're fighting right by her side."

Drake let out a heavy breath. "What should we tell him?"

"We'll figure it out once we start talking to him."

"What if he cries?" Drake asked. "Then _I'll_ start to cry."

"You will?"

"Yeah. Every time he cries, I start to cry too."

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault. It's just... I was like Megan's father for so long... and then of course I was like Nate's father figure too since his real dad skipped town. It's a little odd, but they're my family, you know? I'm really protective of them. My sister is in a coma and my nephew has no clue what's going on. I don't know what to do."

Josh kissed Drake's forehead. "You're handling this situation pretty calmly, if you ask me. You're being very strong for your family, Drake. Anyone else would have snapped by now."

"That's because I have you here to help me."

"Yeah. But we still need to tell Nate what's happening to Megan. At least so he can sort of understand."

"I know."

"Dr. Borde wants us to go this afternoon."

"I know." Drake repeated.

"We need to tell him now."

"I know."

"Drake, he's going to be fine. He's Megan's daughter, he can handle it."

"I guess you're right." Drake said, giving up.

"I am. You'll see. I'm going to go wake him up, ok?"

"Ok." Drake said, sitting on the sofa. "And Josh?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for staying with me and helping me take care of him."

"I'm happy to," Josh smiled. "Besides, this will be the perfect practice for when we have our own kids." Josh winked, making Drake blush, before he walked back to Nate's room.

A few minutes later, Josh returned with a sleepy little boy in his arms. He set him down on the counter and asked what he wanted for breakfast.

"Cookie." he said through a yawn, making Drake and Josh laugh.

Drake stood and walked over to the kitchen area.

"Does he say that every morning?" Josh asked, remembering the past few mornings.

"Yes." Drake said with a little laugh. "It never works, but he always tries anyway." Then he leaned down on the counter and pressed Nate's nose like a button, making him giggle. "So, little buddy. What do you really want for breakfast?"

"O-meal." the boy said with a toothy grin.

Drake smiled. "O-meal it is."

"O-meal?" Josh asked.

Drake reached into a cupboard and pulled out a box, showing it to Josh. "Oatmeal. He's always called it o-meal, so that's just what we started calling it. What flavor, bud? Apple or berry?"

"Berry!" Nate clapped, suddenly appearing more energized.

Drake poured one of the packets of children's oatmeal into a bowel and filled it with water before sticking it in the microwave. "What would you like, Josh?"

"Just coffee is fine." Josh said.

"Again? You've had coffee every morning since you started staying here. You used to love breakfast."

"I don't want you to go to any trouble."

"Trouble?" Drake asked with a smile. "Yeah, because cooking breakfast once in a while is so troublesome. Seriously, what do you want? We have cereal, eggs, bacon, muffins. And o-meal, of course."

Josh chuckled. "Cereal will be fine."

"Are you sure? I don't mind cooking you something." Drake insisted.

"Really. Cereal is good."

"Ok." Drake moved to another cupboard and peered inside. "We have lucky charms, corn flakes, and cheerios."

"Hmmm... cheerios." Josh said.

Drake puleld the box out along with two bowls and went to the fridge to get the milk. He poured Josh and himself each a bowl of cheerios and pulled Nate's oatmeal out of the microwave. He grabbed three spoons from a drawer and stood at the counter next to Josh, who was still holding Nate up on the counter so he wouldn't fall.

"Do... do you want to help me feed him?" Drake asked, dipping the smallest spoon into the oatmeal.

"I've never done it before..." Josh said, a bit frightened. "What if I mess up?"

"It's easy, you can't mess up. Just take the spoon." Drake placed the spoon in Josh's reluctant hand. "Now blow on it so it's not too hot."

Josh blew a gentle breath on the oatmeal, watching the steam whirl around. "Like that?"

"Yep." Drake said proudly. "Now hold it up and just let him eat it. He's not that fussy, and he's old enough where he doesn't spit it out unless he really doesn't like it."

"Ok..." Josh did as Drake said and fed Nate the oatmeal. "Not that this isn't nice... but, doesn't he feed himself?" Josh asked as he continued to feed the little boy.

"Hah. No, not the o-meal. He can, but he likes to fling it onto the ceiling. Don't you?" he tickled his nephew before Josh fed him the next bite. After breakfast, Drake took a damp paper towel and wiped Nate's face.

"Where's Mommy?"

Drake put the paper towel down and gave the boy a pitying look. Then he felt a comforting hand on his back and took in a deep breath. "Mommy is... mommy is sick."

"Sick?" Nate looked confused.

"Yeah. She was so sick, that she had to go to sleep for a little bit."

"Where?"

"She's in a special place where other sick people go to be taken care of while they sleep."

"When she wake up?"

Drake had to take another breath. "I'm not sure. But it could be really soon."

"Ok." he looked sad.

"Would you like to go see her?" Josh asked, realizing Drake had gone as far as he could.

"Yeah."

"Ok." Josh patted the boy on the head. "We'll go today, alright."

"Yay!"

Josh did his best to smile while Drake turned away.

"Unca Josh?"

"Yes?"

"Can we bring her a cookie?"


	21. Maybe If I Sing To Her

**A/N: Another week on time! Aren't you proud of me? :D**

**Chapter 21 - Maybe If I Sing To Her (Posted 13 July 2011)**

"Mommy is here?" Nate asked as Josh carried him through the hospital.

"Yes, she's here." Drake answered, putting on his best fake smile so as not to upset the child.

"Noisy." Nate observed, looking around.

"In this part, yeah." Josh said. "But your mommy is in a quieter part in her own room."

"Alone?"

"Yeah." Drake said, almost choking on the word. He raised a hand to wipe a tear away before anyone saw it. "But she has doctors and nurses with her a lot, so she's not really alone."

"This is her room." Josh said, stopping in front of the familiar door. He and Drake could probably find it blindfolded, because the path was forever ingrained in their minds. He pushed the door open and walked inside.

It never got easier. Walking in and seeing Megan hooked up to all kinds of machines with her eyes closed and her chest just barely rising and falling. Every time was just as shocking as the first.

"Mommy... sleeping?"

"Sleeping." Drake nodded.

Josh set Nate on the floor and watched as he walked over to Megan's bed. Her bed had been lowered for her therapy, so Nate was just able to see over it. "Sick?"

"Very sick." Drake said. What had he done to deserve this? All he wanted out of life was to live happily with his family, but here he was, looking down at his 'sleeping' sister and trying to explain to his beloved nephew exactly what was wrong with his mommy.

It calmed him a little when Josh stepped closer and took Drake's hand in his, tangling their fingers together and squeezing tightly.

"What's that?" he pointed to a clear plastic bag.

"That's called an IV." Josh explained. "It feeds her while she's sleeping."

"Can't eat?"

"No, she can't eat." Josh knew Drake would start crying if he had to open his mouth, so he was trying his best to explain things to Nate until Drake was calm enough to take over.

"So no cookie." This wasn't a question. So no one answered. "Looks... sad."

"She is sad." Drake said, finally finding his voice. "She's been away from you, so I'm sure she'll be happy once she knows you're here. Why don't you try holding her hand?" Drake suggested, remembering one of Dr. Borde's theories.

Nate furrowed his brows and reached up, grabbing his mother's heavy arm and letting it fall off the bed. Drake tensed, worrying about the wires and tubes coming out, but thankfully they were all extra long to allow for movement. Nate curled his tiny fingers around one of Megan's. He looked up at her with eyes full of hope... but nothing happened. "Mommy?"

There was a bleep on a machine.

"What was that?" Drake asked, gazing all around.

"Brain wave monitor." Josh pointed to the blue screen.

"She heard him." Drake gasped. "Dr. Borde said it would be months before we reached her."

"He underestimates the power of the bond between mother and child." Josh said. "Either that, or he didn't want to get our hopes up for nothing... just in case."

Drake didn't even try to hide his tears now. They just rolled down his face as he watched Nate stare at Megan. When Josh's arms came around him, he leaned into his chest and continued to cry.

"Maybe if I sing to her." Nate said, looking deep in thought.

"What?" Josh asked.

Drake pulled back a little and used the back of his hands to clean his face. "Megan and Nate always like to sing together. It's really cute. In fact... it's been weird without it..."

"Why don't you give it a try?" Josh encouraged him.

"Sing with me?" he raised his eyebrows at them expectantly.

"Sure." Drake nodded and tried to smile again. "Will you help too, Josh?"

"Me? But I'm not..." _Do I have a right to?_ "a musician..."

"So? She needs all of us. Please?"

"Ok." Josh said, unable to deny him.

"Thanks." Drake walked over to where Nate was standing and pulled Josh with him since their hands were still entwined.

"What are we gonna sing?" Josh asked.

"Her favorite." Nate decided. Then he jumped right into the song. "Twinkle, twinkle little star."

Drake actually smiled for real and joined in. "How I wonder what you are."

And finally Josh completed the trio. "Up above the world so high. Like a diamond in the sky. Twinkle, twinkle little star. How I wonder what you are.

More bleeps.

Drake's head snapped up to the brain wave monitor. "Again?"

"And that one too this time." Josh pointed to the heart monitor.

"Those are good sounds though, right?" Drake asked.

"I think so. If they were bad, doctors would be rushing in here." Josh said.

"I don't believe it." Drake was stunned.

"We should tell Dr. Borde the next time he comes in." Josh suggested. "That way he can try to incorporate it into his treatment."

"Yeah. And... I'll bring my guitar tomorrow." Drake said sheepishly.

Josh smiled to himself. He knew Drake had given up his music some time ago. And it made him happy to know that he would get into it more, even if it was only temporarily.

"Ok, it's time to go home." Josh said, scooping Nate up into his arms.

"But... Mommy..."

"Mommy is gonna be fine." Drake said. "She wouldn't want you to stay here and be sad. You need to go home and get some more rest. We all do. We'll bring you back tomorrow, ok? And every day after that until she gets better."


	22. Family Life

**A/N: Aaaaaand I'm late again. Really, I have a good excuse this time. My new medicine makes me drowsy and I didn't know it. I just started taking it yesterday so it hit me hard and I fell asleep. But I'll get used to it lol.**

**Chapter 22 - Family Life (Posted 21 July 2011)**

A few months went by and Megan hadn't really gotten any better. She was more responsive since Nate started visiting her and Drake played his guitar for her, but she just couldn't seem to hold on long enough to wake up.

Before they knew it, the whole summer was gone and Nate started going to preschool.

"Do you want to go to the park today?" Josh asked as they watched some television. "It's pretty nice out and I got the stroller fixed."

"That sounds nice." Drake answered. "There will probably be a lot of neighborhood kids there for him to play with."

"Have you ever thought about moving out of this apartment?" Josh asked suddenly.

"No. I thought I'd be stuck here pretty much for the rest of my life."

"Well... I've been thinking." Josh pulled Drake closer to him and laid back on the sofa with Drake laying on top of him. "I think we need a bigger place."

"There are bigger units in this building." Drake suggested.

"I pictured more of a monthly mortgage instead of a rent payment."

"You mean like a house?" Drake asked, surprised.

"Yeah. Our own house. With a big bedroom for us, a nice room for Nathan. Even when Megan wakes up, he'll probably visit us a lot. Maybe a few more rooms for our own kids. Two bathrooms. Modern kitchen. A balcony."

"That sounds very specific for something you've just started thinking about."

"That's because I've been thinking about it for a long time." Josh said. "We're going to need to get Nate a bigger bed soon, and it won't fit in his room. We need a bigger bed ourselves. I've been looking at houses online, and I think I've found the perfect one. It's right near the preschool. It has a two car garage. It's not huge, but it's big enough to raise a family in and have a few guests over."

"Josh, this is a big decision." Drake said seriously.

"I know. That's why I wanted to talk to you about it before I signed the paperwork."

"You already bought it?" Drake asked, almost speechless.

"I'm in the process of buying it."

"Josh, why..."

"I wanted to surprise you. As soon as I sign it the papers, it's ours. We can move in as soon as we want."

"Josh..." Drake said again. "I'm not so sure about this."

"What is there to be unsure about?" Josh asked. "I can afford it. I'm going to be lecturing locally and I've got plenty of money saved up for something like this. I'm ready to settle down with you, Drake, and buying a house is a major step in our life together."

"I don't know..."

"Oh, and did I mention it has a sound room? You could use it as a music studio. You've been playing a lot more lately and I see how happy it makes you. I think you should start performing and you could use the studio to practice and write and even record a few demos if you want. Even if you don't want to make a career out of it, I'm sure you'd still have a lot of fun."

"You've really put a lot of thought into this."

"Yes."

"And... you're sure you can afford it?"

"Positive."

Drake bit his lip. "I guess... we're buying a house, then." he said happily. "I can barely believe it."

"Me either." Josh said, kissing Drake on the temple. "Oh, and one more thing." He stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled out a small box. He flicked it open and looked into Drake's surprised eyes and asked, "Marry me?"


	23. Still Need An Answer

**A/N: A short update because I'm gonna be late otherwise. I just wanted to give you this little tidbit so you don't have to keep wondering :)**

**Chapter 23 - Still Need An Answer (Posted 27 July 2011)**

"M-marry?" Drake stared at his boyfriend. "You wanna get married?"

"Yeah." Josh said excitedly. "Don't you?"

"Well, yes, but... I didn't think you'd ask me so soon."

"You're not ready..." Josh seemed disappointed.

"No, it's not that." Drake looked into his eyes. "I am _so_ ready to get married. I want to be with you in our new house and wear a wedding ring and have a bunch of kids running around. I _want_ it. I'm ready."

Josh smiled. "I still need an answer."

"Yes!" Drake hugged him. "Of course I'll marry you."

Josh took a deep breath, which showed Drake how nervous he really was. "Good. I'm so happy, Drake."

"Me too. I... I can barely believe it. I'm getting married. To you. I love you so much, Josh. It's been such a roller coaster. All of the stuff that's happened between us. But being with you... it's incredible. I just can't help it. I love you."

"I love you too." Josh rubbed his back. "And I'm going to take care of you, ok? I promise. I'm going to take care of you and Nate and Megan and I'm going to do my best to make sure we're all a happy family. I know times have been hard for you and recently it's only gotten worse, but I'm here for you."

"I know. You've been doing a great job so far. And I can't wait to marry you."


	24. A Year In The Life

**A/N: ****Sorry I didn't update last week. I took a little vacation. I mentioned it on facebook. Anyway, I might be updating my stories more than weekly until I go off to school. I'd like to have them close to being completed by then so I don't have to worry about it on top of studying. This story will probably be wrapped up in the next chapter though. See you then!**

**Chapter 24 - A Year In The Life (Posted 10 August 2011)**

A week after Josh's proposal, he, Drake, and Nate all moved into their new house. It was everything Josh described and more. A big yard for Nate to run around in, complete with swing set. A big living room leading to a wide hallway. A few bedrooms. A finished basement and attic, ready to be used for pretty much any purpose. And a nice little kitchen and dining room.

"I love it." Drake said, smiling at Josh.

"I'm glad."

"We get to stay here?" Nate asked.

"Yep." Josh nodded and lifted the boy onto his shoulders. "This is our new house. We live here now."

"Mommy too?"

"Yeah, Mommy too." Drake assured him. "Soon, buddy."

"Okay."

"Nate," Josh said, "why don't you go pick a room to be your bedroom?" He set him down and watched him run throughout the house.

"We're really doing this." Drake said.

"We are." Josh agreed and took Drake's hand.

"I suppose we'll have to go furniture shopping today."

"At least for our beds." Josh said. "The rest we can do tomorrow."

X

A month later, Drake and Josh shared their first kiss as a married couple. They exchanged their vows at the alter, standing straight and tall in their finely tailored tuxedos. It took place in a small chapel near their house, with just a few of their closest friends and family.

Walter and Audrey didn't talk much, but they were civil to each other and didn't disrupt the service.

The whole thing was video recorded, of course, so that when the day came for Megan to wake up, she could see it. They'd considered waiting for her, but given that they didn't know how long it could take, they knew she wouldn't want them to put their lives on hold for her.

That night Audrey stayed at the house with Nate while the newlyweds packed their bags for their honeymoon. She was going to take care of him for a week while the boys celebrated their marriage in Hawaii.

X

Six months later Josh held Drake in his arms as he cried. As they stood in Megan's room, they listened to Dr. Borde tell them he was leaving.

"I'm so sorry, boys." he said with a sad face. "I'd like nothing more than to stay and continue to help your sister, but I'm afraid she's been plateauing for so long that... I'm not sure staying would be beneficial. There are other patients out there that need me, you see. All I can say is that she is very lucky to have a family like you. I've never seen someone so resolute on not giving up on a coma patient."

"I love my sister, Dr." Drake said quietly and without looking at him.

"I know, and that is a wonderful thing. But I don't think I can help her anymore. You know all of my methods and theories. I'm sure you'll continue to try and free her from this coma, but you'll have to do it without me. Of course, feel free to give me a call if you need any medical or even any legal advice. I _do_ want to help, but there are other people who require my services."

"We understand." Josh said. And they did understand, they just wished they didn't have to.

X

After Dr. Borde left, Audrey moved in with Drake and Josh. She helped them take care of Nate while they worked. Josh was teaching at a nearby community college and giving lectures on the side at neighboring universities so he could support his family. And Drake was writing new music and trying to cut a demo. He wasn't sure what his aspirations were yet, but he really was happier to be writing music again.

Another reason she moved in was so she could also start visiting Megan every day with the boys. They thought maybe having her mother there also would get through to her more.

At first there wasn't much of a difference, but after a few weeks she started responding more and more.

X

A few more months went by and the hospital kept pushing Drake to pull the plug. Of course he refused. Josh was still paying her medical bills, and they had enough money to last quite a while.

But after a while Drake decided he didn't want Megan at that hospital anymore. So he and Josh had one of their spare bedrooms set up to accommodate all her equipment and everything and had her transported there.

They had a cluster of private practice and volunteer nurses and doctors keeping an eye on her around the clock. This way they could see her more often and maybe get through to her.

X

Before they knew it, the boys were celebrating their one-year anniversary. Again Audrey took the responsibility of looking after her grandson, and now her daughter as well, as they took another tiny vacation.

It was just a weekend this time. A trip up to New York City. Two nights in a fancy hotel. Spending some time alone in their private hot tub. Eating breakfast naked. Shopping at some of the biggest and craziest stores.

They were watching the ferris wheel in Toys R Us go around and around when Drake felt a strong hand envelop his.

"Happy anniversary, Drake." Josh smiled cutely

"Happy anniversary." Drake smiled back at him as they shared a little kiss and walked out of the store and back to their hotel room.

"I'm kind of sad that we have to leave in the morning." Josh admitted. "I love spending time alone with you."

"I know." Drake said quietly. "We really haven't gotten to do that very much. I mean... we sort of took on the role of parents as soon as we got together."

"I don't mind though. It's worth it. I love you and I love Nate and I love being a family."

"I love it too."

"And I've been thinking." Josh announced.

Drake chuckled. "You're always thinking."

"Drake, you know I love raising Nate with you. And it's going to be hard to give him up once Megan wakes up. But I think it's time to consider... adopting our own child."

"Really?" Drake asked excitedly.

"Yeah, really. I think we're ready."

Drake jumped up and down before squishing Josh in a tight hug. "I know we are."

"That settles it then. We'll start looking into it when we get home."

"I'm so excited, Josh!"

"I know," Josh said as he hugged him back, "me too."

X

When they returned from their vacation, they were greeted by a frantic and overexcited Audrey. "Oh, boys, I'm so glad you're home!" she threw her arms around them, catching them off guard.

Drake laughed. "Gee, Mom, I don't think I've ever seen you this happy to see someone."

"Yeah, Mom," Josh had taken to referring to her as 'mom' again, given that she was his mother-in-law now, "where's the fire?"

"Drake, Josh..." she was practically shaking with excitement. "I'm not the only one who's excited to see you."


	25. Knew It

**A/N: ****Ah. At long last, the final chapter of this story has come. If you've reviewed at all throughout this, thank you. If you haven't reviewed yet, I would really appreciate you reviewing this last chapter, just so I know you were reading it. Thank you also for all the alerts and faves, it makes me so happy! And now, without further ado, the finale.**

**Chapter 25 - Knew It (Posted 15 August 2011)**

"What?" Drake asked, wondering what his mother meant. "Do we have a visitor or something?"

"Sort of. It's someone who hasn't seen us in a really long time." she answered.

"Oh?" Josh was curious as well.

"Yeah. She's waiting for you in her room if you'd like to go see her." Audrey said, hoping they got the hint.

Drake met her eyes. "She?"

"You got it."

Drake felt a hand on his back, as Josh too must have understood what Audrey meant. "You don't mean..."

"Would you just go see her! She's been waiting for you."

Drake took off before his mother even finished her sentence, with Josh close behind him. He stumbled quickly down the hallway until he came to Megan's door, which he promptly threw open and lunged inside. He looked around, a little disoriented, until his eyes finally settled on his sister. Sitting up. With here eyes wide open and an excited smile spread across her face. "Megan." he choked as he rushed over to hug her, careful not to disturb any of the wires she was still hooked up to.

"Hi Drake." she said, hugging him tightly.

"Oh my God. You're awake. You're really awake."

"You didn't really think I'd let a stupid coma beat me, did you?" she joked.

"Of course not," he said, glad that she wasn't being all sad and gloomy about it. "I knew you'd pull through. I knew it."

She pulled out of the hug, but let her brother keep his hands on her shoulders. "Thanks."

"Are you kidding? There was no way I was giving up on you."

"Drake, you're an amazing brother." she said. "You too, Josh." she yelled, knowing Josh was standing just outside the room, not wanting to intrude on them. "Mom told me what you guys did for me. Everything you've done... Paying my bills. Bringing me here. Taking care of Nate." Her voice broke and she started crying.

"Oh, Megs." Josh said, sitting on the side of her bed. "We would have done anything for you. You know that."

"Yeah." she said through her tears. "I know. But I still... it's so overwhelming, you know? I mean... I woke up just a few hours after you guys left. At first... I had a little bit of post-traumatic amnesia. It only lasted the first night. They told me I'd been in a coma and kept me awake, you know, because they didn't want me to go back to sleep until they could run some tests. And by the time the first one was done I remembered who I was and everything. And the last memory I had was being... hit. And then I was told that I'd been out for over a year. A whole year! A whole year of school that I can't get back. A whole year of my child's life that I missed. It just didn't feel like that much time had passed. And then, well after all the tests were done and everything, they finally brought Nate in. And I got to hold him for the first time in over a year and I felt it. He's bigger and heavier and he speaks better and... I could feel that year go by. But... then the doctors gave me and Mom some time along. And she told me all that had happened. And it's still so sad and I hate that I missed it... but I'm so happy. I'm just happy to be alive and happy that you two are together and that my son is healthy and our mom is here with us and I just... I'm sad but I don't _feel_ sad."

"I know what you mean." Drake said. "I felt like that when I went through it. I know mine didn't last as long as yours, but I know how you're feeling. And I'm feeling it again right now. I'm sad that this happened to you but finally knowing that you're okay outweighs everything else. Megan, I did my best to be a good brother and sort-of father to you, but I still feel like I haven't told you enough just how much you mean to me. You were there for me when... when things took a turn for the worst. And you were there for me every time after that too. And I mean... I could have done a better job. I know that. But I think you helped me grow up a little too. If I would have come here on my own, I don't think I'd be as happy as I am now."

"Don't you have anything to say?" Megan teased Josh.

"I'm so relieved to see you awake." Josh said. "You know I still love you like my sister. I was praying everyday that you'd be alright."

Megan nodded. "Thank you so much. Both of you. Drake, I know how hard you worked to take care of me. And Josh, I know you've been paying my medical bills. And I want you to know that I'm going to pay you back-"

Josh cupped his hand over Megan's lips. "Don't even think about it, Megan." he warned jokingly. "I don't want you to pay me back. I won't accept a single cent. This is what family is for. I have plenty of money, Megs. That's not what matters to me. All that matters is that I'm able to support you and Drake and Nate and Mom and as long as I'm doing that, I'm happy. And of course we'll still help you out with anything you need."

"You guys really are the best."

"We know." Drake laughed. "So, when can you get up and start living like a normal person again?"

"Well, they still have me hooked up to an IV because I can't eat a lot since I haven't in so long. But I'm gradually gaining strength and should be off it in a few weeks." she answered.

"That's good." Josh said happily.

"Oh," she suddenly remembered, "happy anniversary by the way." she said with a wink. "I watched your wedding video yesterday. Thanks for recording it for me. You guys looked so handsome in your suits. And of course my little man was adorable as the ring bearer. Anyway, have you had awesome anniversary sex yet?"

"Megan!" Josh yelled, embarrassed.

Drake was used to it. "All weekend." he answered proudly.

She laughed. "Good. So which one of you is-"

"Uh-uh." Josh shook his head. "There's no way I'm talking about that with my sister-in-law."

"Aw, why not?"

"Because. It's private." Josh crossed his arms and looked away, blushing.

Then there was a knock on the door. "Ah, Mr. and Mr. Nichols-Parker, welcome back." It was one of the regular doctors scheduled to take care of Megan. "I assume Megan has filled you in on the details?"

The boys nodded.

"Wonderful." he smiled. "If you don't mind, I'd like to speak with you out in the hall."

"Ok." Drake said. "Will you be alright alone for a minute, Megan?"

"Sure."

So the boys followed the doctor into the hall and closed the door behind them.

"Please," Drake started, "if it's bad news, just tell me now and get it over with."

"I assure you, this is the exact opposite of bad news." the doctor. informed them. "Your sister has amazing strength for a coma patient. And quite frankly, although I commend you for refusing to give up on her, there were times when I myself wondered if she would ever pull through. But she did and I am overjoyed with her success."

"Is that all you wanted to tell us?" Josh asked.

"Mostly. I also wanted to inform you that she can't really walk yet, her lower body strength needs to be built up some. So start out slow; have her stand for a minute or so before walking her around the room until he feels discomfort. As time goes by, she can start walking around the house. I would avoid going out until most of her strength returns. And she may need support once in a while, simply leaning on someone or just being held so she can get her balance."

"That's fine." Drake said.

"Now the other thing I wanted to discuss with you doesn't have anything to do with your sister." the doctor said.

"Well what is it then?" Josh wondered curiously.

"You know that I am a private doctor but I also volunteer at clinics and hospitals occasionally. One of the clinics I work for specializes in teen pregnancy. We have a girl in there, she's seventeen, and she's about five months along. She's very healthy and, aside from making a few poor decisions, she's a good kid. And she's decided she is unable to keep the child. Now I know you two have been talking about adopting for a while now, and I suggested to her that she meet you and she agreed."

"She wants to meet us?" Drake asked.

"If you're interested, of course."

"Um..." Drake smiled and turned to look at his husband. "What do you say, Josh?"

"Well, we did agree that we're ready..." Josh said happily.

"We'd love to meet her, Dr." Drake said excitedly.

"Great." the doctor smiled charmingly. "I'll let her know this week and be in contact with you soon."

"Thank you so much." Josh said.

X

It was just past midnight and Drake still couldn't sleep. "Josh?" he said, turning his head to look at the man laying next to him. "Joshie, are you awake?"

"Yeah." Josh yawned. He turned on his side and laid an arm over Drake's stomach in comfort. "What's wrong?"

"I can't sleep."

"Neither can I."

"Megan's awake."

"I know."

"And we're gonna be fathers."

"Maybe." Josh clarified.

"Still." Drake said happily. "I'm too excited to sleep."

"Excited, eh?" Josh said as he moved a sleepy arm further down Drake's body.

Drake slapped his hand playfully. "You know what I mean." Suddenly he felt something warm on his cheek, and recognized it as Josh's soft lips.

"I do. And I think this calls for a celebration." He moved his lips from Drake's cheek to his mouth and caught him in a passionate kiss. Taking Drake's deep moan as a green light, he climbed on top of him. "I love you."

"I know. I love you too. I hope you know that."

"Of course I know it." Josh insisted.

"Hey, Josh. Do you ever look back and wonder if, somehow, we kind of always knew we'd end up together."

"Sometimes." Josh admitted. "But then other times I wonder where we would be now if we weren't together. I used to think about my future a lot. And I'd picture it and thought about what it would be like. And I look back now and I know I never thought it'd be us, but I'm so glad it is."


End file.
